


Snapshots

by HotGreenTea



Category: EXO (Band), NCT (Band), SuperM (Korea Band)
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, M/M, Past Drug Use, Past Violence, Romantic Comedy, Social Media AU, Tenwin, baekyong, kaimark, markai
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-19
Updated: 2020-11-16
Packaged: 2021-03-08 03:08:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 17
Words: 37,481
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26548756
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HotGreenTea/pseuds/HotGreenTea
Summary: Kim Jongin is an in-house photographer for SM (SuperMan) Magazine. Mark Lee is the shy and sweet intern who is not as innocent as he appears.image heavy || social media au || also posted on twitter @KaimarkAU
Relationships: Byun Baekhyun/Lee Taeyong, Dong Si Cheng | WinWin/Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul | Ten, Kim Jongin | Kai/Mark Lee (NCT)
Comments: 93
Kudos: 110





	1. CHAPTER 1

Jongin checked the name on the clipboard as the next intern walked in. Every new batch of interns meant a new batch of headshots. Their webmaster rarely updated the intern section, so this was mostly busy work, but Jongin tried to make the best of it.  
  
A boy that barely looked old enough to have an internship shuffled in, predictably dressed like a college student at his first job. Black sneakers with his dress pants. Flannel shirt trying to pass as fancy by being buttoned all the way to the top.  
  
The name on the clipboard read Lee Minhyung.  
  
"Okay, you can just sit down on the black chair over there." Jongin gestured towards the seat between the two large studio lights.  
  
"Do I need to like... pose or anything?" Minhyung asked.  
  
"Nope, just sit down and and smile. Like an ID photo."  
  
Minhyung sat up, back far too straight, mouth twitching uncomfortably.  
  
"So. Uh. You must like cars, huh?"  
  
Jongin snorted. "What makes you ask that?"  
  
"You know, like." Minhyung gestured vaguely. "You work here."  
  
"Don't move your arms." Jongin instructed. "Yeah, I like cars. My friends think I should be more excited about meeting the models though. It's not all its cracked up to be."  
  
Minhyung opened his mouth in surprised. "Meeting models?"  
  
"Yeah, and dating them."  
  
"Oh." Minhyung looked down and smiled shyly.  
  
Jongin flipped through his shots so far, dissatisfied. "Can you try to make a more natural expression? Don't overthink it, this isn't a big deal."  
  
Minhyung, continued to look down, mysterious smile remaining on his face. "Sorry. I didn't expect the photographer to be handsome."  
  
Jongin laughed. "Look at the camera. Or you can look at me if it feels more natural."  
  
"Will I get to keep the photo?" Minhyung said, meeting Jongin's eyes. He was so earnest and pure. Jongin's heart melted a little.  
  
"No, but I can take one for your personal use later. Give me your number after this."  
  
Minhyung beamed and Jongin finally got his shot. "Nice one. You're all set."  
  
Minhyung hopped up and pulled his phone out of his pocket, making his way toward Jongin.  
  
"I'm Jongin, by the way." Jongin said as he approached.  
  
"Mark Lee."  
  
"Ma-keu-lee?"  
  
"No, Mark Lee. I'm Canadian. Call me Mark."  
  
Jongin took Minhyung - no, Mark's phone and put his number in. "What are you doing for your internship, Mark?"  
  
"Nothing special. Writing photo captions." Mark replied.  
  
"Hm. Maybe I'll see more of you then."


	2. CHAPTER 2

When Mark arrived at work Jongin was already leaning on his desk, looking down at his phone.  
  
"Someone's here to meet you." His cubiclemate, Donghyuk offered unhelpfully.  
  
"Hi Jongin!" Mark blurted. He was already coming off too excited. He needed to tone it down.  
  
Jongin gave him a small - and in Mark's opinion, sultry - smile. He was so effortlessly cool. "Hey Mark. I had some free time between meetings so I thought I'd just wait for you to come in."  
  
"Did you know his friend owns a pet shop? Man, am I ever headed down the wrong career path." Donghyuk shook his head.  
  
Jongin chuckled. "At your age I don't think a career change is a very big deal."  
  
"Can I visit the shop sometime? I'd love to pick your friend's brain!"  
  
Jongin broke into a warmer, giddier smile. "Mark and I going tonight after work! You should come!"  
  
Donghyuk grinned too, but as he seemed to realize something he quickly deflated.  
  
"Dang, I can't. I have a stupid date tonight." Donghyuk scoffed and rolled his eyes. "That sounds like way more fun."  
  
Jongin's eyes smiled into little crescents as he giggled (like a school girl, to be honest) at Donghyuk's statement. "It does, doesn't it?"  
  
Good riddance, Mark thought. He had only known Donghyuk for one day and he already wanted to strangle the man.  
  
As Mark sat down his bag, Jongin pulled out his chair for him. "Let me show you how to access those files. I already talked to Minseok in IT to make sure you had the credentials."  
  
"Do I have the credentials?" Donghyuk had rolled his chair over beside Mark and was looking over his shoulders. Mark could feel his lip twitch in annoyance. Jongin just shrugged.  
  
"You can email Kim Minseok and ask. For now you can just watch as I show Mark."  
  
Jongin reached over Mark's shoulder to grab the mouse. His chest brushed up against Mark's hair. Mark flicked his gaze over to Jongin's handsome profile. After making a few clicks, Jongin met Mark's eyes. He raised his eyebrows.  
  
"You need to look at the computer not at me."  
  
Embarrassed, Mark turned his attention back to the computer. "Sorry," he mumbled.  
  
Jongin cleared his throat and looked back at the computer himself. "You'll need to login for me."  
  
"What do we do if we forget our password?" Donghyuk asked.  
  
Jongin didn't respond.  
  
"Did you hear me?" Donghyuk asked louder. Mark clenched his jaw.  
  
"Huh?" Jongin replied as if he was coming out of a trance.  
  
"What. Do. We. Do. If. We. Forget. Our. Password?" Donghyuk's slowly voice boomed out each syllable as though he thought Jongin had become spontaneously hard at hearing.  
  
"Ah. Kim Minseok for that too." Jongin put his hand on Mark's shoulder and Mark resented the butterflies that swarmed in his stomach.

Mark smiled as he made eye contact with Jongin, jogging to meet him. He had taken off the tacky sweater vest he had on earlier and was now in only the crisp white t-shirt underneath. He had also swapped out his dress pants for basketball shorts. The oversized clothes made him appear ever tinier than before. He wasn't much shorter than Jongin, but with his earnest eyes looking up through his lashes at Jongin while he adjusted his bangs... he felt so vulnerable. Innocent. A sweet little person Jongin wanted to protect.  
  
"Are you going to be too hot walking through Seoul in that?" Mark asked, tugging on the sleeve of Jongin's long-sleeve button up.  
  
Jongin's stomach fluttered. Mark Lee was definitely a guy with a lot of charm and natural cuteness.  
  
"I'm used to it. I like to look good." Jongin flashed him a toothy, confident smile to reassure him. Mark raised an eyebrow and his grin may have shown a hint of mischief. He didn't protest further.  
  
"Where is your friend's pet shop?" Mark asked as they headed toward the metro.  
  
"Hongdae. He loves the arts and is a party boy to the core."  
  
Mark nodded. "I have some friends with a dance studio around there. Not far from the Playground."  
  
"I can guarantee you Chanyeol has never set foot in there. He has two left feet." They laughed. Mark had a cheerful, infectious giggle.  
  
"Can YOU dance?" Mark bumped his shoulder, beaming playfully at him.  
  
Jongin weighed his options for answering that. It was a sore subject. He finally decided on, "I don't."  
  
Mark opened his mouth to say something, then closed it. It seemed he had read between the lines of Jongin's tone. Jongin felt guilty for crashing to mood, but it really wasn't a topic he wanted to discuss.  
  
Once they were seated on the train, Mark figdeted with the pop socket on Jongin's phone. The phone was on Jongin's lap, and Mark wore the same mischievous smile as earlier. Jongin gently removed Mark's hand.  
  
"Don't break it."  
  
Mark took the opportunity to play with Jongin's fingers instead, mischief melting making into warm innocence. He looked so cute. Dangerously cute. A couple of Jongin's girlfriends had given him that look, but in their cases he was pretty sure it was on purpose.  
  
Mark ran a finger over a vein in Jongin's hand. "You have really manly hands."  
  
Jongin turned Mark's hand over. It was definitely smaller. "It's not like your hands are unmanly." Jongin chuckled.  
  
"I know. I wasn't comparing, I was just commenting." Mark tickled Jongin's palm and asked, "Hongik station?"  
  
Jongin nodded. Mark let go of his hand. "Then our transfer is next."

Jongin's friend Chanyeol was struggling to put a small black poodle into a harness when they arrived in the pet shop. Mark could quickly deduce Chanyeol's proclivity towards a hipster aesthetic. The pet shop had a retro styling, and appeared to mostly sell small animals like rabbits, fish, and hamsters. There were about a half dozen dogs and cats in kennels, each with a small profile attached to the front.  
  
"Perfect timing." Chanyeol, having finally managed to clasp the dog's harness, picked the critter up. "Toben needs another walk. He won't stop barking and it's stressing out the customers."  
  
"I'm guessing this is the problematic dog?" Mark asked. Jongin laughed.  
  
"Chanyeol, this is Mark Lee, the intern I was telling you about." Jongin informed Chanyeol. "Mark Lee, this is my friend from high school, Park Chanyeol."  
  
Chanyeol flashed Mark a radiant, toothy grin and bowed. "Hey, thanks for helping. Bummer about the girl situation over at SM, huh?"  
  
Mark snorted, surprised. "What?"  
  
"You know, how there aren't more girls working there." The dog - Toben - was squirming desperately to get out of Chanyeol's grasp.  
  
"I mean, I guess." Mark was more concerned about the amount of bros trying to out bro each other. "Not really a magazine a lot of women read, though."  
  
Chanyeol nodded enthusiastically. "Exactly! More women should read it."  
  
Jongin reached out for Toben, who was now snapping at Chanyeol's face.  
  
"Chanyeol's a big fan of our work, if you couldn't tell." Jongin looked amused. Toben excitedly licked Jongin's face when Chanyeol handed him over, making Jongin's eyes crinkle into a smile.  
  
"You must be having so much fun, Mark!" Chanyeol said. "I'm a little jealous." Mark resisted the urge to tell him this wasn't exactly his dream magazine to intern for.  
  
"Anything you want to tell Mark about Toben before we take him out for some exercise?" Jongin asked, saving Mark from having to indulge Chanyeol's excitement.  
  
"Toben is a little monster and I can't wait to get rid of him." Chanyeol grumbled. Jongin stared back at Chanyeol, eyebrow raised. Taking the hint, Chanyeol quickly added, "Except that he is wonderful and anyone would be lucky to have him in their home!"  
  
Jongin grabbed the profile hanging on Toben's kennel, reading aloud. "He's projected to be about 2 or 3 years old, neutered, up-to-date on shorts, hypoallergenic, saved from a kill shelter."  
  
"See, he's still a puppy! Everyone loves puppies!" Chanyeol boomed with insincere gusto.  
  
Mark scratched Toben's head, grinning at  
Jongin. "He seems like you, Jongin."  
  
Toben had calmed down significantly in Jongin's arms. Mark suspected it was the contrast between Jongin's steady energy and Chanyeol's exuberance and overeagerness.  
  
They walked Toben around some of the less crowded back streets of Hongdae to avoid overstimulating the excitable pooch too much.  
  
"You seem to really like animals," Mark observed. Jongin was doing his best convince Toben to continue to walking in spite of the dogs instance on pulling towards a restaurant specializing in pork belly. Jongin's eye smile had been ever present since Chanyeol had handed Toben over to him.  
  
"My family has four poodles." Jongin was giddy talking about this subject. "They're my babies."  
  
Mark had no idea how Jongin could look so sexy, like he had earlier reassuring Mark of his fashion choices, while also being as cute as he was now. It tangled Mark's lust up in a confusing affection he had never expected to have when he first laid eyes on Jongin.  
  
"Why aren't you working at a dog magazine, then?" Mark had intended to tease, but Jongin looked wistful.  
  
"I would love that. But a hyung offered me this position after I - well, he offered it to me a while back and it was too good to turn down." Jongin stuffed his free hand into the pocket of his black slacks. "It makes Chanyeols happy, at least."  
  
"So you're not a big fan of SM yourself, huh?" Mark asked. He hadn't expected that answer.  
  
"No, I like it. I like photographing luxary cars and clothes." Jongin wrapped his arm around Mark's shoulder. It was a perfectly heterosexual move for a Korean man, but Mark was still Canadian enough to not be able to fight off the butterflies in his stomach.  
  
Jongin noticed Mark staring at the hand draped over his shoulder and began to remove his arm. Mark quickly grabbed his hand to stop him.  
  
"Sorry! The Canadian in me will probably never be used to that." Mark gave Jongin a reassuring smile. "But I don't dislike it."  
  
Jongin looked back at Mark thoughtfully. He was back to the sexy Jongin, the Jongin that filled his stomach with fire instead of butterflies.  
  
Toben let out a shrill bark, startling both of them. A woman with his giant husky was approaching from the other direction. Jongin removed his arm from around Mark to focus on reining Toben in.


	3. CHAPTER 3

Mark felt apprehensive about going into work following Donghyuk's discovery of Jaehyun's post. He had no way of knowing if Donghyuk would keep his word, and given Donghyuk's tendency toward constant chatter Mark didn't have high hopes.  
  
He felt sick to his stomach walking through the door, wondering if everyone he saw already knew. Would his supervisor even want a gay man working at such an aggressively heterosexual magazine?  
  
Donghyuk was typing on his computer when Mark entered the cubicle. He raised a hand to wave to Mark, eyes still on the screen. Mark greeted him in return. He sighed heavily, letting out the anxious air in his lungs and plopped down to check his emails.  
  
In the midst of replying to a message from his supervisor about being out of the office for part of next week, he heard a swivel chair creek up behind him.  
  
"I didn't tell anyone." Donghyuk whispered. That was a pleasant surprise.  
  
"Thanks, man." Mark stopped typing and turned to look at Donghyuk. "Seriously."  
  
"Can I ask you more questions?" Donghyuk asked. He appeared to be trying to supress his excitement at discussing the topic.  
  
Mark was wary of this. "Right now?"  
  
"Just a few!"  
  
Mark took a deep breath. He wasn't entirely out of the woods yet.  
  
"You can have two."  
  
"Two a day?" Donghyuk bartered. He put his hands under his chin and smiled cutely.  
  
"Fine." Mark glanced around, to see if anyone was in earshot. "Just keep it down."  
  
Donghyuk also looked around. He then leaned in close to whisper, "Was Jay your boyfriend?"  
  
"Not really. We were just messing around." Mark shrugged. "Next?"  
  
Donghyuk nodded. "Okay. Next. Am I handsome?" Donghyuk grinned wide and threw up a v-sign next to his face.  
  
Mark snorted and shoved him away. "Ew. Go back to work."  
  
"Hey-y!" Donghyuk grabbed onto Mark's desk to keep from rolling back. "Answer the question!"  
  
"You're not my type." Mark watched Donghyuk deflate a little at that answer. So he added, "If it makes your feel any better, there are definitely gay men that would be into you."  
  
"Of course they would!" Donghyuk responded triumphantly. "I'm a catch."  
  
"Okay, you can take your fragile straight boy ego back to your desk now." Mark felt his stomach ease up a bit. Maybe Donghyuk wasn't THAT bad.  
  
"Wait!" Donghyuk yelped as Mark turned back to his computer. "What's your type?"  
  
Mark chuckled. "I guess you'll have to ask me tomorrow."

The first thing Jongin registered upon waking up was how miserable he felt. His head was throbbing. His stomach was nauseated. At the age of 26 was he really already too old to handle company dinners?

It then occured to him that he wasn't in his bed. He was on top of a futon blanket, and there was a warmth against his back. He carefully turned around, and the fluffy brown dog next to him stirred.

He smiled in spite of his agony and scratched the dog's ears.

"Hi Monsieur. Is Sehunnie awake yet?"

Monsieur rolled over and exposed his belly. Jongin rubbed fulfilled the dog's request and yawned. As he looked around the apartment for signs of Sehun, he heard a passcode being punched in outside the door. Monsieur jumped up excitedly and Vivi came bounding down the stairs from Sehun's loft.

When Sehun stepped through the door, the dogs began to yip excitedly.

"You're awake." Sehun commented. He wore his typical bored, unimpressed expression.

"Yeah, I feel like shit. Were you working on The Hill?"

Sehun removed his shoes and crouched down to fuss over his pets. "Mhm. Glad I was able to rescue you before I went in." He looked up from petting Vivi. "How much do you remember?"

"I don't remember coming here." Jongin replied. He thought back to the night before. Company dinner. Senior employees making him drink too much. Mark playing guitar...

Aniexty stirred in his already nauseated stomach. He had definitely drunk texted Mark. And he definitely remembered telling him he was cute.

"Where's my phone?" Jongin asked. Sehun plopped down on his couch. His dogs hopped up with him and settled into his lap. He pointed at a charger near where Jongin had been sleeping.

"I charged it for you. You might have some damage control to do."

Jongin groaned. "Fuck."

"Yeah."

Jongin sighed and reached for his phone. He was terrified of what he might find.

He checked his messages with Mark first. They were pretty mortifying, but Mark hadn't seemed put off which was a relief. Still, he had pretty shamefully exposed feelings he didn't even want to have. He typed out a quick apology and scrolled through his other messages.

"There's something I need to ask you." Sehun was standing above Jongin with a bowl of ceral. Jongin had lost track of what was going on around him between checking his messages and deleting humiliating twitter posts.

Jongin gulped. He had a bad feeling about where this was going. "Okay."

"Do you like Mark?"

"Of course I do. He's a cool guy."

"You know what I'm asking."

Jongin sucked in air. He dropped his phone in his lap and rubbed eyes.

"I can't. Not like that."

When he looked at Sehun again, his friend was gazing at him with an abnormally intense expression.

"You can do anything you want, Jongin." Sehun held his gaze. "What do you want?"

"I just don't want to make any trouble."

Sehun looked unconvinced. "Hm." He went back to eating his ceral. "If you're hungry you have to make your own breakfast. I'm going to bed. Let yourself out whenever."

Baekhyun shoved the last piece of kimchi in his mouth. He was still chattering excitedly about the game. The match had ended almost an hour ago, and while Taeyong had enjoyed it he was ready to let the evening go in another direction. He snuggled up the Baekhyun while he talked, laying his head on his sholder stroking his arm.

Baekhyun paused from detailing a play he had been particularly fond of. "Are you drunk? Do you need to crash here tonight?"

Taeyong laughed. "No, just cozy." He shouldn't have felt nervous. It wasn't like he usually had trouble getting a guy to sleep with him if that was what he wanted. But Baekhyun seemed so far above him, so special. He'd watch him on stage command so many roles and wow the audience with his vocals. And it had been a while since he had been with anyone. Plus... Baekhyun was just such a kind person. Taeyong hadn't been with a lot of kind guys.

He looked up from Baekhyun's shoulder, into his eyes. The corners of Baekhyun's lips were stained red from the kimchi. Taeyong laughed and touched the corner of his mouth.

Baekhyun's lips parted into grin. "What?"

Taeyong willed himself to be sexy. He couldn't be shy, nervous Taeyong. He might miss his chance. He lifted his head off Baekhyun's shoulder and licked the corner of Baekhyun's mouth.

"Oh my gosh." Baekhyun's voice sounded filled with wonder. "You sure you're not drunk?"

Taeyong pulled away, searching Baekhyun's eyes for some kind of clue that this was alright, that he wanted this too. "I'm sure."

Baekhyun reached out and put his hand on Taeyong's neck. Steeling himself against the fear of rejection, Taeyong put on the sexy face he saved for performancing. "Can I sleep over anyway?"

"Fuck." Baekhyun pulled Taeyong's face forward and kissed him. The taste of kimchi lingered in Baekhyun's mouth. Spicy and sweet, like Baekhyun.

Taeyong slid his hand up Baekhyun's baggy black t-shirt, feeling his soft belly and runnimg his fingers over his nipples. Baekhyun sighed into their kiss.

"I have to get up early tomorrow for an important meeting." Baekhyun said whistfully. "We can't stay up too late."

"Do you not want to do this?" Despite his efforts to appear confident, Taeyong felt himself deflate a bit.

"That's not it!" Baekhyun quickly assured him. His looked directly into Taeyong's eyes. "Are you kidding? I'm a lucky bastard. You're the hottest guy I've ever seen." There was a laugh in his voice. He put his forehead against Taeyong's. "I'm halfway amazed you're even into me. "

"Anyone would be into you, hyung." Taeyong didn't entirely believe that Baekhyun was doing anything more than flattering him, but it was still nice to hear. He dragged his hands back down Baekhyun's chest until he reached his pants. As he unfastened them made eye contact with Baekhyun again. "Let me help you sleep better."

"Fuck." Baekhyun breathed. Taeyong reached into his baggy pants to stroke his dick. Taeyong kissed him again, slow and deliberate. He caught his lower lip in his teeth before letting go. He pulled away from Baekhyun so he could kneel in front of him on the couch.

"Wait!" Baekhyun said, stopping Taeyong before he could put his mouth on Baekhyun's dick. His hands cupped Taeyong's confused face. "Condom."

Taeyong laughed. He hadn't expected that. "You're so responsible." Even though Taeyong had let down his sensual facade, Baekhyun's expression didn't change.

Taeyong crawled to where his bag was discarded by the table.

"You keep yourself prepared." Baekhyun noted, watching Taeyong pull a pack of condoms out of his bag.

Rather than responding to the observation, Taeyong said, "It's a shame we don't have time to use more." It was probably better Baekhyun didn't know he didn't usually keep his bag stocked with the necessary supplies for sex and that this was situationally specific.

Taeyong tore the condom wrapper open and returned Baekhyun. He focused his mind on seduction once more. He was going to make the most of the time they had.


	4. CHAPTER 4

"So for that reason, I think the particular BL your girlfriend is reading is pretty inaccurate." Mark was answering one of Donghyuk's daily questions when a familiar face approached.  
  
Jongin was beaming at them, eye smile as warm as ever. "What are you guys talking about?"  
  
"Well, you see my girlfriend's reading this -"  
  
"Sports!" Mark cut Donghyuk off, worried where too honest an answer would lead them. "His girlfriend is reading a sports manga and we were discussing how accurate it was."  
  
A thoughtful expression settled on Donghyuk's face. "Do gay people play... uh," Donghyuk stopped himself in the middle of the question looking nervously between Jongin and Mark. "Nevermind. What's up Kim Jongin?"  
  
Jongin looked curious, but to Mark's relief he didn't press the subject. "Mark, have you ever modeled before?"  
  
"What?" Mark was unsure if he had heard correctly. "Have I ever what?"  
  
"Modeled?" Jongin rubbed his neck. "We have a quick piece we need to shoot for and we don't have time to call in a professional model."  
  
"Doesn't SM usually go for models that are more... I don't know... women?" Mark giggled a bit.  
  
"Well, it's for the men's fashion section. You actually have kind of the perfect look we're going for."  
  
"Can I do it? Do I have the look you're going for?" Donghuk piped up excitedly. He never could keep his mouth shut.  
  
"Uh," Jongin shifted his weight awkwardly. Mark resented how adorable he looked. Jongin would probably hate to know Mark had a crush on him. "Mark works more closely with my department?"  
  
Jongin sounded unsure. Almost like it was an excuse. Almost he specifically wanted Mark. Did Mark really fit the SM image that well?  
  
Donghyuk nodded in resignation. "Your position is definitely more fun than mine, Mark."  
  
"What are we shooting?" Mark asked. Jongin's smile brightened.  
  
"Follow me. We need to get you styled." Jongin gestured for Mark to come with him. Mark hopped out of his seat, nodding to Donghyuk.  
  
Jongin wrapped his arm around Mark's shoulder. "I hope you don't mind wearing denim."  
  
"I'm Canadian." Mark replied.  
  
Jongin's eyebrows rose. He looked at Mark like he was waiting for an explanation.  
  
"I'm saying of course I'm comfortable in denim."  
  
Jongin laughed and slapped Mark's shoulder. "Good, good."  
  
After Mark had gone through hair and makeup and was dressed in head-to-toe denim, he and Jongin headed outside to take pictures.  
  
"I can't believe you're letting me do this after how awkward I was on that first day." Mark said, filling the silence as Jongin and a coworker set up Jongin's equipment.  
  
"I've seen how handsome you can be when you don't try." Jongin replied, grinning widely as he fiddled with the settings on his camera.  
  
Did this straight boy really not know how much of what he said came off like flirting? No wonder he had managed to date models. If you somehow avoided being knocked off your feet by his looks, his personality would undoubtedly do it.  
  
"Okay, lean against that wall there." Jongin instructed, eyes on his camera's LCD display.  
  
Mark did as he was told.  
  
"Good. You don't need to do anything with your expression, your natural face is good." Mark smiled in spite of himself. He heard Jongin laugh, likely at how he had already failed the follow a basic instruction. He cleared his throat and tried to school his expression back into neutrality.  
  
"You're so cute." Jongin told him. "I wish I could use your cute expressions for this shoot."  
  
Jongin was making it really difficult to hold back a smile. He was just so effortlessly charming.  
  
"Can you turn and show us your profile?" Jongin asked. Mark turned. "As expected, so handsome."  
  
Mark snorted. How did Jongin ever manage to photograph models without smiles?

"So where are we going for drinks?" Mark asked cheerily as they departed from the SM Magazine offices.  
  
"Are you hungry? We could get some pork belly too." Jongin suggested. "My treat."  
  
Mark smiled that angelic smile that made Jongin feel like a hopeless teenager with a crush again. It was enough to just be around Mark like this, wasn't it?  
  
"Can I do more modeling gigs in the future? Free dinner and drinks is nice." Mark said. "Do I get anything else out of this?"  
  
Jongin looked down at the baggy brown and orange button up Mark was wearing over a pair of dark skinny jeans. "Maybe some fashion advice?"  
  
Mark made a sound that was probably supposed to be a scoff but came out more like a squeak. His big eyes were round with surprise. "What's wrong with the way I dress? This shirt was my dad's."  
  
"From a decade before you were born?" Jongin teased. He ruffled Mark's hair and grinned at Mark's startled and possibly offended expression.  
  
"Shut up." Mark said. His smile was adorably lopsided. "We can't all afford to dress like Gucci spokesmodels."  
  
Jongin laughed. "I wish I could afford Gucci. I'm not that high end."  
  
"You carry yourself like you are though. You have a model swagger." Mark said. He was looking in interest at Jongin's chest or, more accurately Jongin supposed, Jongin's crisp white shirt. Jongin cleared his throat, eyes landing on a familiar cartoon pig sign.  
  
"This place is good." Jongin said. Mark tore his eyes away from Jongin and looked inside.  
  
"It looks cozy." Mark observed. The restaurant was small, its little tables spilling out onto the street. It had good food and a nice atmosphere. Perfect for getting to know someone. Even a someone who could only remain a Just Friend.  
  
They sat down and Jongin ordered their meat and drinks.  
  
"How old are you, Mark Lee?" Jongin asked as Mark automatically began grilling their meat.  
  
"21." Mark replied. "What about you Kim Jongin?"  
  
"Woah. You're so young. I'm 26." Jongin replied. He had expected Mark to be young, but it was always weird to be reminded how far away from college age he already was.  
  
Mark nodded. "So are you. Don't act all old and wise." Jongin laughed.  
  
"So my fashion?" Mark asked. He kept his eyes on Jongin as he turned over a piece of meat on the grill. "What tips do you have for me, old sage?"  
  
"Hm. Maybe we can go shopping together sometime." Jongin mused. Mark had a different body type than him. It would be better for him to try clothes on rather than Jongin to just tell him what to wear. It certainly wasn't just an excuse to spend more time with Mark.  
  
"Sounds fun." Mark took a drink of his beer. Mischief filled his eyes "Maybe I can convince you to buy a shirt that shows off your arms better."  
  
Jongin choked on his beer.  
  
"You know, for the weather." Mark added innocently.  
  
Jongin picked up a napkin to wipe off his face. "I have shirts that show my arms. I just don't wear them work."  
  
"Hm." Mark reached over to Jongin's bicep and squeezed it. He looked almost delighted. "You're hard as a rock. You must work out. Don't you want to show it off?"  
  
Jongin might have been blushing. He hoped ge wasn't. Mark was just a skinny guy marvelling at a bulky man's muscles. It was nothing to get worked up about.  
  
"I try to. It's not as easy as it used to be." Jongin said. He pulled a piece of meat off the grill and began building himself a wrap.  
  
"Oh? Work keeps you that busy?" Mark was carefully putting a ball of rice into a leaf. It was cute how focused he looked.  
  
"Yeah, and just life in general." Jongin was very much uninterested in getting into more of the specfics on that topic. After popping another wrap in his mouth, he decided the change the subject.  
  
"What did Donghyuk want to ask you about before you left today?"  
  
Mark looked up from adding bean sprouts to the grill. He looked mildly concerned. "Oh, he's just always pestering me with personal questions."  
  
"Personal questions? Like what?"  
  
Mark looked anxious. "Just. About my interest and stuff." He sat down his chopsticks and took a drink. "My type."  
  


That threw Jongin off. "Why, is he interested in you or something?" Jongin joked.

Mark laughed, long and loud. "Oh gosh, man, no. Definitely not." Mark continued to laugh, shaking his head. "Thankfully."

Jongin laughed too. "Is he trying to set you up?"

Mark took a long drink and seemed to consider his answer. "Probably not. I wouldn't trust him to set me up anyway." He laughed again, but it sounded more hollow this time.

Jongin nodded and took a drink too, finishing his glass. Mark diligently refilled his drink for him. He was curious why Mark was being so cagey about this subject, but he supposed he didn't have room to pry when he had secrets he kept close to his own chest.

They ate and drank and silence for a bit, before Mark asked how Toben was doing.

Jongin grinned. He loved talking about dogs. It was a much more comfortable subject than working out or Donghyuk. "He's lively as ever. He seems really happy when he plays with the other dogs at the shop." He giggled and began to recount stories of Toben's misadventures at Chanyeol's store as well stories stories of his own poodles. Mark beamed through Jongin's tales, eyes round with interest. He looked so handsome, so pure. Jongin wanted to kiss him.

If Mark was a girl, this would be like a date. If Mark was a girl, Jongin could maybe try to kiss him, at the end of the date. But Mark wasn't a girl and even if he had gay friends he might not like a guy trying to make a move on him. Not that Jongin could dare to do that even if Mark wasn't bothered. Even if Mark was into men. It was too messy. He couldn't do messy, not anymore.

Jongin was jolted from his thoughts by a hand squeezing his thigh.

"Under your fancy clothes, you have a great body." Mark commented. His eyes were on Jongin's lap. By now they had made it through two pitchers of beer. Mark was definitely drunk. Jongin was too, which might have been why he was more giggly and more facinated by Mark's lips.

"Are you trying to bulk up?" Jongin asked. He rubbed Mark's tiny arm. He snorted, noticing how little it was and put his fingers around Mark's bicep. "You're so little."

Mark watched Jongin's fingers snake around his arm and looked up at him through his eye lashes. So doe-eyed. So fucking cute.

"Do you think I'd look better with more muscle?" He sounded earnest. Vulnerable. He wasn't his usually awkwardly confident self.

Jongin laughed and put his hand on Mark's shoulder. "No. You look really good. Really really good. Don't change anything. You're perfect." Jongin wasn't sure how long it was before he noticed he was staring at Mark. Mark was unbothered, staring back sweetly.

"You're perfect too." Mark finally said. He looked down at Jongin's body. "You're so hot. No wonder models want you."

There was something darker in Mark's expression. Jongin was just drunk enough to think it looked lustful. But he also had enough of his mind left to know that was probably wishful thinking. Mark looked so good. He definitely wasn't a girl. And Jongin definitely wasn't overlooking that. He was definitely into that. Mark was a handsome guy and Jongin liked him as a handsome guy. It was a problem.

Mark's phone vibrated on the table. He glanced down at it and groaned.

"Fuck." Mark picked up his phone and started quickly texting someone.

"What's wrong?" Jongin asked.

"My best friend is upset about something and isn't responding to Ten's - another guy we know - texts. It's probably that fucker Baekhyun."

Jongin laughed. "Woah strong language from Mark Lee."

Mark smiled at him. Mischief again. He went back to texting.

"I'm gonna make sure Taeyong is okay." Mark sighed and looked up at Jongin whistfully. "I had a lot of fun."

"Let me pay and walk with you to the metro at least." Jongin said. Mark nodded. He was answering a text again.

When Jongin returned from paying, Mark was standing at the front of the shop, looking at his phone. We he looked up at Jongin, he bit his lip and his eyes scanned him up and down.

Jongin was definitely going to be thinking of Mark tonight, whether he liked it or not.

Taeyong was holed up in his bedroom staring vacantly at the game on his computer screen when Mark entered.

"Taeyong, bro, what's up?" Mark asked, shutting the door behind him. Taeyong startled, turning around.

"Mark, you really didn't have to come." Taeyong said.

"It's fine. I'm still your pastor's kid friend to your mom, aren't I? She was thrilled to see me." Mark sat down on Taeyong's bed.

"Yeah, she likes you. Probably thinks you'll help me turn my life around." Taeyong got up and turned on the lights. He then sat down next to Mark. "You smell like beer."

"I went out for drinks with a hot guy." Mark put his head on Taeyong's shoulder and linked their arms together.

"Woah, why aren't you with him?"

"Because I love you more. And because he's the straight guy from work."

Taeyong laughed. "He seems to like you."

"Yeah, maybe he wants a bromance." Mark said. "I'd prefer if he'd fuck me though."

Taeyong patted Mark's arm. "I know. Straight boys are disappointing."

Mark snorted. "You can say that again. So what's up? Baekhyun being a dick?"

"Ten is overreacting." Taeyong said.

Mark lifted his head and looked at Taeyong sympathetically. "He cares about you a lot."

Taeyong looked away. "Its my fault. About Baekhyun. I should have listened to you guys."

Mark hated when Taeyong beat himself up. Taeyong could act tough we he needed too, but inside he was unsure of himself.

"When Johnny asked me to be his boyfriend, you told me I needed to either say yes or to stop sleeping with him. I didn't listen to you, and I hurt someone. He acted like he was okay with it - he still does. But it hurt him a lot." Mark moved his arm up to Taeyong's shoulder. "I hurt him because I was selfish. You got hurt because you cared about someone. If you think I have any room to rub this in... well, you're being way too nice to me."

Taeyong sniffed. He wiped a tear from his face. He still didn't look at Mark. "I'm sorry."

Mark tilted his head. "For what?"

"I'm kind of a shitty hyung."

Mark laughed. "You're kind of the best hyung. Do you think just any hyung would be nice enough to put up with my bullshit this long?"

Taeyong's lip twitched. "Jaehyun wanted to date you too, you know."

"Naw, he wanted me to be his, he didn't want a clear label like 'dating' to ruin his fun."

Taeyong finally turned back to look at Mark. His usually tough eyes looked so soft and sweet.

"Why don't you want a boyfriend, Mark?"

Mark took a deep breath. That was a question he didn't think he'd have to answer tonight.

"It's not that I don't want one," Mark said slowly, looking up at Taeyong's ceiling. "I really want a boyfriend, actually. It's just... you know... it's scary."

He didn't look at Taeyong, but he could feel his eyes on him. He was waiting patiently, giving Mark time to finish.

"Just screwing around with someone is easy to compartmentalize. I don't have to tell my dad, it doesn't have to come up at school or work." Mark smirked. "I can stay sweet pastor's kid Mark to your mom and visit you without your family getting worried."

"If I cared if my parents worried I wouldn't have told them I had a guy I liked."

Mark snapped his head back to Taeyong. "You told them that."

"I can't walk on eggshells forever, Mark. And neither can you." Taeyong gave him a sad smile. "When I came back they knew I wasn't going to try to be straight. We had to talk about who I was sooner or later."

Mark pulled Taeyong into a hug. "I admire you so much, bro. Baekhyun is the worst."

Taeyong sighed, wrapping his arms around Mark. "I still hope he isn't."

Jongin appeared in Mark's cubicle right as Donghyuk was attempting to wrestle the only quality sharpie out of Mark's hands.

"Let me finish this first!" Mark was grumbling. When his eyes landed on Jongin, he was mortified.

"Oh, I'm interrupting something. I'll come back later." Jongin looked between the two men, amused. "I was on my way to a meeting and I thought I'd just drop by here and grab you."

"I can finish tomorrow!" Mark yelped. He let go of the sharpie, relinquishing it into Donghyuk's now much looser grip.

"I don't know," Jongin said, stuffing his hands in his pockets. "You seemed to be in a pretty big hurry."

Mark snorted. "No, this guy just hogs all the office supplies."

"I use them more than you!" Donghyuk retorted. He protectively pulled the sharpie close too his chest. "And you take forever to finish things."

"I don't want to do a sloppy job." It occured to Mark that maybe he sounded as whiny as Donghyuk. And maybe that wasn't a good look to display in front of his older, cooler colleague.

"You're saying I do a sloppy job?" Donghyuk replied, much louder than was necessary.

Jongin cleared his throat. Both men turned to attention back to him. "Are you ready to get out of here, Mark?"

Mark nodded. He resented Donghyuk for making him look like such a brat.

"Where are you guys going?" Donghyuk asked, eyes following Mark as he stood up and grabbed his bag.

"Photo caption training." Jongin said. He giggled and slapped Mark's shoulder. It should have been a dead giveaway that he was being facetious. Donghyuk, however, just sighed.

"You seriously get to have all the fun."

Later, while flipping through racks of clothes at a boutique, Jongin was still giggling and making jokes about "photo caption training". Mark laughed too, even when the jokes were bad. Jongin had an infectious joy.

"What should I caption this?" Mark said, holding up a black and white sweater.

Jongin beamed. "Mark Lee should try this on."

Mark turned the sweater towards himself. "Really?"

"You don't like it?" Jongin looked surprised.

"No, no! It actually really looks like my style." Mark said. "I just thought my style was no good."

"It's not bad, we're just going to polish it a little." Jongin put his hand on the small of Mark's back and led him towards the dressing room. "Try it on."

"Wait!" Mark frantically began looking for a tag. "I need to see how much it is before I get attached."

"I'll pay. It's no big deal."

Mark stared at him, shocked.

"I'm your hyung now. Let me contribute to your future." Jongin move his hand up to Mark's shoulder and patted it. "Let's see it on you! I'll look for some of that demin you love."

While pulling on the sweater in the dressing room, Mark's mind reeled. Was this straight boy bromance? He was used to guys he was sleeping with buying him little gifts (or big gifts like that keyboard he should NOT have accepted from his not-boyfriend Johnny) but not bros just buying each other random clothes. He and Jongin were getting closer but saying they were like brothers was a huge stretch.

When he exited the dressing room in the sweater, Jongin was holding up two jean jackets and considering them.

"How do I look?" Mark asked spreading his arms open. He felt so awkward. This whole situation was out of his comfort zone.

Jongin stared for a moment, looking thoughtful. "Do you like it?"

"It's comfy." Mark hugged himseld with his arms to illustrate.

Jongin laughed. "It looks nice."

"Are you sure you don't mind buying it?" Mark asked again. "I don't want to put you out."

Jongin was looking at the jean jackets again. "Which one of these do you like?"

"Uh, the lighter would look better with this sweater wouldn't it?" Mark offered. Jongin flash him a huge grin.

"See, you're not completely incompetent at fashion."

Jongin was chuckling when he handed Mark the jacket to try on with his sweater. Mark pulled it on and look in the mirror.

"You really don't have to -"

Jongin waved his hand. "I'm funding an intern's future."

Mark smiled awkwardly and adjusted the jacket. "You're so cool, hyung."

They left the store with a bag of new clothes and Jongin's arm around Mark's shoulder. He didn't really have much experience with dates, but Mark couldn't help but wonder if this was what a date felt like. Maybe he really was entering into his first dudebro bromance.

Jongin looking up from texting someone on his phone. "Do you want to meet my friend Sehun tonight?"

"Woah, seriously?" Mark asked. "I finally get to meet the man who rescues you from drunken escapades?"

"Don't bring that up, it's humiliating." Jongin shook Mark lightly. "Are you okay with going to Itaewon? He has something he has to do later tonight."

"Okay, but I can't stay out too late. My dorm has a curfew." Mark whined.

"Ugh, I could not stand to have a curfew as an adult." Jongin scoffed. He pulled his arm off Mark's shoulder so they could step single file onto the escalator down to the metro.

"Do you live alone?" Mark asked turning around to look at Jongin as they descended.

"No, I live with my family." Mark had suspected as much. "They don't mind when I get home as long as I'm quiet."

"Are you a quiet drunk?" Mark teased. He grinned playfully up at Jongin. Jongin rubbed his neck.

"Luckily Sehun lives alone." Jongin said. They both laughed.

Mark was missing the contact of Jongin's arm around while they were waiting for the train to come, so he pulled him into a hug. "Thanks for the clothes, hyung."

Jongin wheezed out an awkward giggle. "What are you doing hugging a guy like this?"

Right. Mark still didn't know where the lines were with straight bromance. He got too caught up in it; he was enjoying having a hot guy wrapped around him too much. He pulled away. Jongin didn't look upset, but he did have an embarrassed smile. Mark really did not get straight boys.

Sehun was waiting with drinks at a table outside a convenience store. He stood to greet Jongin and Mark. He was dressed even fancier than Jongin. He had a tan blazer and matching pants paired with black dress shirt.

"Mark, this is my high school friend, Sehun. Sehun, this is the intern I've been telling you about."

Marked bowed. He definitely recognized Sehun.

"Do you... stream at all, Sehun?" Mark asked after they had all sat down and begun to drink.

"Yes, when I'm not working at a club up on The Hill." Sehun said, looking completely unbothered by what some might see as a controversial occupation. Mark thought he might have seen Sehun at a club before too. He hoped Sehun didn't remember him.

"My best friend Taeyong likes your show." Mark's throat was dry. He took a big drink.

"Typically people who watch me are gay or female." Sehun was so nonchalant. Like none of this was a big deal to say. Mark looked over at Jongin, who was staring down into his cup. He seemed apprehensive.

"Yes... Taeyong is gay." Mark admited.

Jongin, looking up, opened his mouth to speak. He closed it and looked at something above Mark's head seconds before a hand landed on his shoulder.

"Markie!" squealed a familiar voice. Mark turned around to see Jungwoo decked out in full drag behind him, grinning widely.

"Oh, Mark you get more handsome every time I see you!" Jungwoo picked Mark's cheek. "I can't stop falling for those dimples."

"Who are you?"

Mark and Jungwoo both looked over at Jongin. He was wearing a dark expression.

"I go my Ms. Snoopy around here but Sehun and Mark know me as Kim Jungwoo."

"You know Sehun too?" Some of the darkness faded from Jongin's expression to give way to confusion.

Sehun was snickering in amusement. "She's a drag queen, Jongin."

Jongin turned to Mark, mouth agape. "How do you know her?"

"Taeyong is close with her." Mark explained helplessly. Maybe coming to Itaewon with Jongin had been a bad idea.

Jungwoo scooted himself onto Mark's lap. "I want to get closer with you too, Mark." He planted a lipstick-caked kiss on Mark's cheek.

"Ey, watch it." Mark shoved Jungwoo away, throwing an awkward smile Jongin's direction. The darkness had returned to Jongin's face. Mark gulped and tried to wipe the remnants of lipstick off his check.

"Don't you have a curfew?" Jongin asked.

"I'm sure he has time." Sehun said airly. "Ms. Snoopy, would you like a drink?"

"Yes, but only a quick one before I have to hurry off. Are you coming tonight, Sehun?"

"Of course, but you'd better not be boring."

Jungwoo made a face while pouring himself a drink. "I'm never boring." Jungwoo refilled Mark's cup as well and handed it to him. "Cheers, Mark!"

Mark touched his glass with Jungwoo's and downed his drink. This was painfully uncomfortable. He wanted to escape.

"Maaaark." Jungwoo whined. He put his hands on either side of Mark's face. "Give me your number, I want you to come out with me sometime."

Mark nodded and held out his hand for Jungwoo's phone. He just wanted all this to be over.

"I should probably go after this." He said. "I really can't back to late."

"If you want to come to the show tonight you can crash at my place!" Jungwoo offered.

Mark wondered if his laugh sounded as pained as it felt. "I'm sorry, I really can't tonight. Maybe next time."

Jungwoo pouted but let Mark get up. "Text me, okay?" Jungwoo said, beaming down at Mark.

"Yeah, sure." Mark waved before turning to head towards the metro.

After a few seconds, he heard hurried footsteps behind him.

"You forgot your clothes." Jongin held up Mark's bag.

Mark smiled. "Thank you, hyung. Seriously."

Jongin just stared at him for a moment. He seemed to want to say something, but he didn't open his mouth.

"I had a good time." Mark tried. Jongin's eyes were contemplative. He stared at Mark a little longer.

"Yeah. I did too. Can I walk you to the metro?"

It was only a block but... "Sure."

They walked in silence, Mark stealing glances at Jongin. He appeared deep in though.

"Well... have a good evening. Thanks again." Mark waved and started to turn around. Before he could, Jongin pulled him into a hug.

"Uh, why are you hugging a guy like this?" Mark joked.

"I'm you're hyung. I can hug you, right?"

Mark laughed. He definitely did not understand straight guys.


	5. CHAPTER 5

"Hello again!" Jongin looked up from his phone to see a tall, handsome man standing next to him at the crosswalk. The man waved. "Jongin, right?"

He looked vaguely familiar, but Jongin couldn't quite place him. "Yes. I'm sorry but what was your name again?"

"Oh, you don't recognize me." The man flashed an innocent smile and for a brief second he looked like Taemin. Jongin gulped. "Kim Jungwoo. We met last night when I was... headed to my show."

It clicked. "The DRAG QUEEN?'

Jungwoo face crinkled up in delight. He seemed amused by Jongin's shock.

"You're very..." Jongin hesitated to finish.

"Handsome? Charming? Lovely?"

"...manly."

The light changed just as Jungwoo let out an amused laugh. Jungwoo stayed beside Jongin as they crossed the street.

"So Mark tells me you're a photographer. Do you two work together?"

"Yeah, he's an intern at my company." Jongin was still in shock that the beautiful queen that had been all over Mark the night before was also an attractive man. This somehow made Jongin dislike his forwardness even more.

"He's so handsome. Do you know if he's seeing anyone?" Jungwoo asked. Jongin cringed internally. That was certainly not a subject he wanted to think about.

"What makes you think you'd be his type?" Jongin replied. He felt kind of sick to his stomach.

Jungwoo gasped, but when Jongin glanced at him, his expression was playful. "Mean! Well, I guess there's only one way to find out." He winked.

"l guess." Jongin wondered where this man had the confidence to ask out a man who might not even be interested in guys. Did he assume Mark was gay just because his best friend was?

"Where are you headed, anyway?" Jungwoo asked. Jongin realized that he had been so engrossed in their conversaion that he had lost track of his surroundings. He looked around. He was going the complete wrong direction.

"l need to turn here." Jongin lied. Better to make another wrong turn than to admit to Jungwoo he had followed him away from his destinated.

"Okay!" Jungwoo looked like he was going to laugh. It was annoying. "Tell Mark I said hi!"

Jongin did NOT want to do that.

"Where Mark?" Jongin asked. Donghyuk was the only one sitting in the cubicle, and for some reason he was hunched over Mark's desk.  
  
"Jongin! You did bring donuts!" Donghyuk said, head snapping up. " What kind did you bring for me?"  
  
Jongin sat the boxes of donuts next to Donghyuk and opened the top one. He used a napkin to pull out a glazed donut and hand it to him. He also pulled out the cookies and creme donut he had selected for Mark.  
  
"How come Mark gets a special one and I get a regular one?" Donghyuk whined.  
  
"Beggers can't be choosers." Jongin said. He sat Mark's donut gently down on his desk. "Will Mark be back soon?"  
  
"Not idea." Donghyuk said around a mouthful of glazed donut. "I'll make sure he gets this donut though."  
  
Jongin glanced around. He wondered if he should wait a little longer in case Mark came back quickly.  
  
"Oh, Mark's getting a text from Jungwoo. He's popular, isn't he?" Donghyuk was looking down at Mark's desk again. At Mark's phone.  
  
"What did Jungwoo s... why do you have Mark's phone?" Donghyuk smiled up at him and took another huge bite of donut.  
  
"Jungwoo wants to go out for drinks or a movie. Do you think he likes Mark?" Donghyuk mused. "I wonder if he's muscular."  
  
"Why would it matter if he was muscular?" Jongin asked. It was a strange non sequitur.  
  
"Because Mark likes -" Donghyuk stopped. A realization set on his face. He chewed his donut without saying anything, eyes round and fixed on Jongin. "He just looks like he'd be muscular."  
  
"What does Mark like?" It almost sounded like...  
  
Donghyuk nibbled awkwardly on his donut. "Exercising?" He offered. He did not sound sure of that answer.

Mark finished another song, glancing nervously up from the strings at Jongin. Jongin was grinning like an idiot but was enjoying Mark's presence and the buzz of alcohol a bit too much to care.

"What's that song about?" Jongin asked. It sounded like it had been English mixed with another language.

Mark smiled shyly. He was so adorable. "It's just a love song."

Jongin wished he had understood the lyrics. He wanted this beautiful boy to sing him love songs all night.

"Do you write music?" Jongin asked as Mark sat his guitar back in his case. He began fishing a bottle of soju out of the bag Jongin had brought. 

"Sometimes. I used to do it more. With Taeyong and with... someone else." Mark screwed the lid off the soju bottle and flicked the loose strand at the end of the cap before handing it to Jongin. "If it falls off for you, you have to grant me a wish."

Jongin snorted. "If it falls off for you, you have to tell me a secret." Mark scooted closer to Jongin. "Taeyong likes to write music?" Flick.

"Yeah, it's a hobby of his. He probably could have been an idol but companies didn't love his past." Mark looked at the cap now in his hand. Flick.

"What kind of past? Or was it just because he was gay?"

"No, he..." Mark hesitated. "It was a mix of stuff. It's not really my story to share though."

Flick.

"How did you meet him?" Jongin asked passing the cap back. "Taeyong?" Mark had that mischievous grin again. He flicked the strand and they both watched it fall to the ground.

"Is that the secret you want to know?"

Jongin leaned back, considering. Mark took a swig of soju and passed the bottle to him.

Jongin actually had a lot he wanted to know. He wanted to know what he really thought about Jungwoo being interested in him. He wanted to know why he seemed familiar with so many gay men. If he was honest, those questions were just there to masked what he really wanted to ask, which was... well, he couldn't just ask Mark that.

He gulped down some soju. "I want to ask something good."

"Okay." Mark nodded, watching him with a sweet expression. He seemed so pure. So sweet. Like he couldn't possibly have a single secret.

"You told Donghyuk your type. Tell me." Jongin flashed Mark the most charming smile he can manage and Mark's expression softened even more.

"That's a pretty big one for just a soju cap." Mark said, pulling a pillow off his bed and holding it in front of himself like a shield.

"Is it? You told Donghyuk." Mark was looking at him like one of his poodles when they were hoping to get out of trouble. Jongin laughed. "Why is it such a big secret?"

"I like a person who is strong." Mark said. His chin was on the of the pillow and his eyes were round. Jongin wanted to pull him into his lap.

"Strong? Physically? Emotionally?" Jongin blamed the burn of soju in his esophagus for pushing the matter.

"Physically." Mark said. "I like a person who is physically strong." That explained why Donghyuk had wondered if Jungwoo was muscular. It didn't need to be a secret... if it was athletic girls Mark liked. Maybe it was wishful thinking, but Jongin couldn't help but suspect it might not be athletic girls he was talking about. Maybe...

What was Jongin hoping for? Even if Mark happened to be gay, which was probably much less likely than Jongin wanted to admit, it wasn't like he could date a guy. He was getting his emotions tangled up in another charming, handsome man that he could never have.

"I met Taeyong my 2nd year of high school." Mark snapped Jongin out of his thoughts. "I snuck into a club underage and got really drunk. He got me out of a dangerous situation. He's been the number one person I can trust ever sense."

Jongin stared at him. He wouldn't have expected that kind of recklessness from Mark. 

Mark sat the pillow in his lap and finished off the soju. "That's a freebie. Because I like you." He winked. Jongin's heart skipped a beat. "It's a little more interesting than my type, right?"

"Why did you go to a club underage?" Jongin asked.

Mark shrugged. "Why do teenagers do anything?"

They both just looked at each other. There were so many layers there, beneath the surface. He wondered if anyone could ever peel them all back.

After a while, once again sporting his mischievous smile, Mark got up from his floor cushion and startled Jongin by plopping down in his lap.

"How drunk are you?" Jongin teased. He hoped his delight wasn't obvious.

"Are you not drunk?" Mark asked, nuzzling into Jongin's chest. Jongin was going to die. He was so happy. He wanted to kiss Mark's head so badly. "If you want you can stay here."

"Will Jeno care if I use his bed?"

"Sleep with me." Mark mumbled into Jongin's shirt. 

If Mark was a girl, Jongin would have felt like he won that lottery. But he had to suppress that excitement, that joy. This didn't mean anything. It couldn't mean anything.

He couldn't wake up tomorrow and kiss Mark on the forehead. They couldn't be late for work after making love on Mark's stiff dorm mattress. This was just two drunk friends, sharing a bed.

Jongin wrapped his arms around Mark. He wished things could be different. "Okay."

Jongin woke up with Mark's breath on his neck. They were cuddled together on Mark's bed, Mark pressed closely against him with his arms wrapped around Jongin. It was wonderful. It was also terrible, because Jongin's body was reacting to the situation in ways he didn't want it too.

Currently, he was wearing shorts and a t-shirt he had borrowed from Mark. He could still remember Mark dragging his hands down his chest when he had taken off his shirt. "You're so fit." He'd said. He definitely seemed interested in muscles. Jongin was going crazy.

Jongin carefully pried himself away from the handsome man sleeping next to him and headed toward the door. A shower would help.

"Where are you going?" Mark's tired voice asked from behind him.

He turned to see Mark stretching, his cute stomach peaking out from under his shirt.

"Shower... there's one on this floor, right?" Mark nodded.

"Do you need a towel?"

"Sure." Jongin had been hoping to just sneak to the showers and take care of things unnoticed. Mark pointed to his dresser.

"Top drawer, on the right." Mark yawned. Jongin glanced over while pulling out a towel. Everything he did looked so angelic.

"Bet it's been a while since you slept in a dorm." Mark commented lazily.

Jongin snorted. "Yeah." He started towards the door again. "I'll be right back."

Mark wiggled his fingers is a cutesy wave. Jongin wanted to get back in bed with him.

When Jongin returned, Mark was sitting at his desk, typing on his laptop.

Mark turned to Jongin and then snapped his hesd down, smile shy.

"Oh, do you need to borrow some clothes?" He said. He was still grinning but avoiding eye contact. He was also playing with a strand of his hair. "Don't want it to look like you're doing a walk of shame or something."

"I don't care about that. Happens in our office all the time." Jongin smirked. "It'd be more embarrassing to show up in some of the stuff you own."

"Oh come on it's not THAT bad." So defensive. So cute.

Jongin pulled his boxers back on under his towel to avoid further scandalizing the apparently much more shy sober Mark.

"You go in later, don't you?" Jongin asked, pulling on his pants.

Mark had his eyes fixed on his computer once more. "Yeah, I have an online class first."

"Okay. What are you doing after?"

Mark glanced over his shoulder. Jongin was shrugging on his shirt. Mark's eyes dropped to Jongin's bare chest.

"I... I'll be here." Mark replied, eyes unmoving even as Jongin buttoned up his shirt.

"Playing guitar and avoiding homework?" Jongin teased. He liked the feeling that Mark was admiring his body.

Mark responded with a distracted laugh. Jongin left the top three buttons undone. No need to be modest.

"Yeah, it will probably be homework."

"Jeno will be back to keep you on track?" Jongin knelt down to work on gathering up the garbage from the night before.

"Yeah, he will be back but he might distract me too." Mark smiled. "If you have to go, I can clean up."

"I'll clean up first." Jongin said, tossing the empty containers into the trash. "I guess we can't hang out tonight then?"

Mark's face went soft again, like it had last night. "If you want hang out again I can finish early."

"I don't want to mess up you studies." Jongin flung his bag over his shoulder. "Keep me posted. We can always do tomorrow."

"Didn't you say you were too busy to even work out?" Mark was beaming.

"No, I said it's harder to work out. I have to do more boring workouts now than when I was younger." Jongin explained.

Mark scrunched his brows together. "Why?"

"I have to go now. Maybe you'll win a secret later." Jongin winked. He might have seen Mark's Adam's apple bob. Maybe it was wishful thinking.


	6. CHAPTER 6

Mark would not be happy with him.  
  
Taeyong shouldn't have been making out with Baekhyun on his couch, but he was. He should have went straight home after they had walked Baekhyun's dog, but he didn't.  
  
Yerim would say he was lacking in self respect. Mark would say he shouldn't dignify Baekhyun with any of his time. Maybe they were right.  
  
"Hey," Baekhyun said in between kisses. "Hey, wait a second."  
  
Taeyong lifted his head, looking down into Baekhyun's puppy dog eyes.  
  
"I - we should talk." Baekhyun gave him an awkward, toothy smile.  
  
Taeyong hoisted himself onto his elbows, taking some of his weight off Baekhyun. "About what?"  
  
"You're very handsome."  
  
Taeyong smiled. "So are you."  
  
"No, I'm - that's not my point. You were really mad at me."  
  
Taeyong sighed. His eyes drifted to Baekhyun's coffee table. "I'm not anymore. Not really."  
  
Baekhyun put his hands on Taeyong's cheeks and pulled his attention back to him. "I don't want you to be upset with me."  
  
"It's hard to stay mad at you."  
  
"I don't want to hurt you."  
  
Taeyong stared. Baekhyun looked so earnest. He was oozing with the usual abundance of confidence and flirtation. He seemed... gentle.  
  
"I can handle it." Taeyong said.  
  
Baekhyun snorted. "Are you serious? You shouldn't have to."  
  
Taeyong's eyes drifted to Baekhyun's lips. Baekhyun shook his face lightly to get his attention once more.  
  
"Hey. Where are you looking?" There was teasing in his voice.  
  
"Sorry." Taeyong forced himself to focus on Baekhyun's eyes.  
  
"Choreograph my musical." Baekhyun said.  
  
"I've never choreographed a musical before." Taeyong said.  
  
"I'm busy, but I want to spend time with you." Baekhyun seemed to be searching his eyes. Taeyong gulped.  
  
"I can't agree to anything without Taemin."  
  
"Okay." Baekhyun grinned and slid his hands down to Taeyong's neck.  
  
Taeyong felt uncomfortable. His stomach hurt. He pulled away from Baekhyun's grasp, sitting up.  
  
"You don't owe me anything, hyung." He looked away again. "I'm not... I'm not a good person."  
  
Baekhyun tilted his head. "What do you mean?" He seemed amused, unbothered. "You friends seem to care about you a lot."  
  
He didn't want to talk about this. He didn't want Baekhyun to sacrifice the quality of his musical for him. He had wanted Baekhyun so bad, and now that it felt so tangable... now that Baekhyun was acting so serious...  
  
"I should go."

There were five people crammed into Mark's tiny dorm room when Jongin arrived. The boys were being loud and rowdy, yelling at the switch and roughhousing. When Mark saw Jongin his eyes brightened. He grabbed his backpack and hurried to the door.  
  
"Thank you so much for rescuing me, hyung." Mark said. Jongin eyed the chaos in the room.  
  
"Yeah, it sure does look like you're being tortured." One of the boys shouted something in Chinese and another responded by chucking a joycon at him.  
  
"Renjun, you're going to break it!" Scolded one of the boys, whose amused expression betrayed his faux outrage.  
  
"Renjun, you can't murder Chenle. We'll be in so much trouble if our floor has a body count." Mark called to the boy who had thrown the controller.  
  
Jongin laughed. Mark by himself was mature, but there was a boyishness in his eyes when talking to the other students in his room.  
  
"I don't know how anyone gets stuff done in a dorm." Jongin commented as Mark shut the door behind him.  
  
"Yeah, it definitely helps you reach a new level of procrastination though." Mark joked.  
  
When they arrived in the coffee shop, Jongin ordered for both of them while Mark set up his homework. When Jongin came back with their drinks and cake, he scooted his chair closer to Mark.  
  
Mark's eyes lit up at the sight of the cake. "Thanks hyung! They have the best cake here." He reached for a fork.  
  
Jongin grinned as Mark took a bite, balling his hands up in excitement and wiggling as he tasted it.  
  
"What are you working on?" Jongin asked. He took a bite of the cake. It was too sweet for him. At least Mark liked it.  
  
"It's an essay for a journalism class. Most of my assignments are essays this semester." Mark sighed and turned back to his computer. He put his head on his fist, looking sadly at the screen.  
  
"Is that what you're studying? Journalism?"  
  
"Yeah, I was hoping for more relevant work at my internship but you know how it goes." Mark dragged his fingers over his track pad, eyes still on the screen. "What did you study?"  
  
Jongin fidgeted with the fork in his hands. He shouldn't have brought majore up. "In grad school I studied Photography. In undergrad I was a dance major."  
  
"Dance?" Mark turned away from his laptop to look at Jongin. He seemed surprised. "Didn"t you say you don't dance?"  
  
"Your memory is seriously something else..." Jongin took a deep breath. He looked at the fork in his hands, still dirtied by cake crumbs and icing. "Yeah, I was injured and had to give it up."  
  
"I'm sorry, hyung. That's rough." Concern covered Mark's face. "It must have been hard to give that up."  
  
Jongin nodded. "I had to give up a lot of things that year."  
  
"Why did you choose photography?" Mark asked.  
  
"I had an opportunity, and I needed a job. It's nice. Still creative, it pays well. It's more than a lot of people have." Jongin sat down his fork and reached for his coffee. "I'm generally a pretty unlucky person so I'll take what I can get."  
  
Mark nodded sympathetically. "I guess you get to date models at least."  
  
Jongin snorted. "I'd rather dance, to be honest."  
  
"You can't dance at all anymore? Could you do like synchronized swimming or something?" Mark suggested.  
  
Jongin burst out laughing. "Really?"  
  
"I mean, it's easier on your joints and stuff... but it's still like... rhythmic movements?" Mark sounded less certain of his suggestion now. Jongin laughed again.  
  
"Maybe. You're so funny." He leaned back in his chair, feeling more relaxed.  
  
"I'm serious! It's sad to give up your passion entirely."  
  
Jongin grinned at Mark. He had such a pure heart. "Would you go with me to a synchronized swimming class?"  
  
"Maybe? I might be really bad." Mark said.  
  
"You have to come if you want me to try it." Jongin pressed. Mark laughed, playing with his ear.  
  
"Okay. If you sign up I'll go too, hyung." He was smiling down at the table, folding his ear in and out.  
  
"Good." Jongin sipped his coffee. "It will be fun at least if I have you there with me." Still grinning, Mark turned back to his screen.  
  
"I need to write this essay."

"Yeah, get to work!" Jongin scolded. "You'll never get a real journalism position if you just eat cake and talk to your friends."

Mark giggled. "Okay, okay hyung. I'm working. Are you just going to scold me while I write?"

Jongin sat up and reached for his bag. "I brough my tablet so I can edit photos and supervise your studies at the same time."

After Mark had finished his assignment, Jongin walked with him back toward his dorm.

Jongin stuffed his hands into his pocket. He liked Mark. He knew Mark liked men. He wondered if he could...

"Are you going to go out with Jungwoo?"

Mark looked at him, startled. "Uhm. No. He's not really what I'm looking for."

"Why not?" Jongin wondered if Mark would admit it to Jongin himself.

"Uhm." Mark looked a bit concerned. "Are you joking?"

"Doesn't your best friend date guys?" Jongin tried.

"Yes. I mean. That doesn't mean I do?" Mark played with the straps on his backpack, turning his attention forward.

"You don't?" Jongin was beginning to wonder if he and Sehun had somehow both gotten it wrong.

Mark stopped walking. He let out a long breath and turned to Jongin again. "Was it Donghyuk? Did Donghyuk say something?"

Jongin blinked. "Why would Donghyuk say something?" Oh. The muscular comment. Donghyuk had helped clue him in, if he was honest. However... "No, Donghyuk didn't say anything. I just figured."

Mark's eyes didn't seem to know where to look. "I... how did you figure it out?"

Jongin shrugged. "Does it matter? It wasn't one thing in particular."

Mark nodded. "Okay. Okay." He breathed out heavily again. "So. You don't care that I'm... gay?"

And there it was. Mark was gay. No more wondering. No more wishful thinking. He really was interested in men.

"Jongin?" He realized he had just been staring at Mark, registering the confirmation he had recieved. Mark could really date him. If Jongin wanted. If Jongin were able to ask him out. "You okay? I understand it's..."

"No! I'm okay. You're okay. This is okay." Jongin reassured him. "I'm sorry I just... so why didn't you want to date Jungwoo then?" He wondered if Mark had a boyfriend. He was definitely a catch.

"I just... don't really want a boyfriend right now." Mark was twisting his backpack strap between his fingers. "That's not... I'm not looking to date, you know?"

Oh. "Oh." That was more soul crushing than it should have been considering Jongin wasn't even supposed to date guys. "That's understandable." But he liked him so much. "You're really busy." Jongin wanted to spend every second he could with him. "I know how that goes."

Mark nodded. "Yeah. Well. I guess I better get back then. You won't tell anyone else at work, right?"

"No! No, of course not. I'm sorry for prying. But you know I don't care, right?"

"No, it's cool. Thanks for being cool." Mark sounded so uncomfortable. Jongin wanted to hug him so badly. "I have to go." Jongin was still dumbstruck.

He let him go.

Mark plopped down on his stomach on Johnny's couch, opening the Star Wars comic he had grabbed off his shelf. Johnny was brewing coffee at the kitchen counter. There was a knock at the door.  
  
"Oh, shoot. I forgot my friend was coming to drop something off." Johnny left the kitchenette and walked towards the door.  
  
"Hey, Sehun." Mark heard Johnny greet as he threw open the door. Mark glanced up from the intimidating image of Thrawn. He was dressed only in a pair of boxers and one of Johnny's large button up shirts he had joking put on earlier. It was in this state that his eyes met Oh Sehun, best friend of Kim Jongin.  
  
"Mark Lee, is that you?" Sehun asked. He was sporting a smug smile and didn't even bother greeting Johnny. "The gay world really is a small one."  
  
Johnny snorted. "Mark must be getting out more if he met you."  
  
"He works with my high school friend." Sehun said. He finally stopped staring at Mark and turned his attention back to Johnny. "You should have told me you were having a boy over. I would have come another time."  
  
"Sorry, I completely forgot until I heard the knock." Johnny took the box Sehun was holding. "Did it work okay?"  
  
"It worked well enough. You should probably get a nicer one though." Sehun replied. "I'll send you some links to higher quality mics."  
  
Mark turned back to the comic. He wondered if this would be another thing for Jongin to question him about. He was getting really sick of straight boy questions.  
  
"Can I have some tea before I go?" Sehun asked Johnny.  
  
"Uh, I guess. Mark's kind of underdressed." Johnny glanced back at Mark.  
  
"That's okay, he's nice to look at." Sehun said. Mark looked up and met his eyes again. He looked so devious. It was unsettling.  
  
"It's cool, Johnny." Mark said. Mark hoped he would just have his tea and leave. At least if he was drinking something he might stop staring at Mark.  
  
Mark sat up so there was room for Sehun on the couch. "Do you know if they have that translated to Korean?" Sehun asked Mark, nodding at the comic book in his hands. "My friend Chanyeol loves Star Wars."  
  
"Uh, sorry. I, uhm, don't know." Mark laid the comic across his lap, covering a little more of his thighs from view. "I haven't read it before today. It's cool Chanyeol likes Star Wars though."  
  
Sehun lounged casually against the back of the couch. He looked completely at ease with the situation. "I didn't know you and Youngho were close."  
  
"We're not really close."  
  
"Ah. I see." Sehun was looking at him like he thought he understood everything. It was unbearable. Mark sighed and closed the comic, tossing it in Sehun's lap and standing up.  
  
"I'll be right back." He called to Johnny. He walked into Johnny's room and checked his clothes on the drying rack. They were still damp. He wished it was cold enough for Johnny to turn on the floor heating so he could spread out his clothes on the floor and let the ondol dry them faster.  
  
He faceplanted on Johnny's bed. It had been a stressful day already without Sehun barging in to gather stories for Jongin to question him about later.  
  
He had gotten closure with Johnny, which had been both necessary and painful for both of them. It could have ended there, but the stress has caused Mark to spill hot chocolate on his white clothes. He ended up at Johnny's apartment, scrubbing them with detergent in his bathroom sick, dressed in a shirt that didn't fit him at all but had made them both laugh after a long and unpleasant conversation. Up until Sehun had shown up it had just been a challenge of making a concerted effort not to have sex with the man he had just told in no uncertain terms he would never be in a relationship with. Being responsible and unselfish was hard work. Sehun leering at him and trying to guage the nature of his relationship with Johnny was something he just didn't have the energy for.  
  
He peaked in Johnny's drawers again, looking to see if there were any sweatpants with a significant enough draw string that, if tightened and tied, would stay around Mark's small hips. It didn't help that Johnny tended to prefer baggier clothes. Sighing in defeat, he forced himself to go back into the living room.  
  
Johnny was sitting on the floor drinking coffee while Sehun sipped his tea. They were, thankfully, discussing microphones and not Mark.  
  
"Do you need anything?" Johnny asked as Mark sat back down next to Sehun.  
  
"I don't trust myself with another drink." Mark replied dryly. Johnny laughed and took a drink of his coffee.  
  
Sehun turned on Mark. Why did he feel so much like prey? "So, Mark, what's Jongin like at work? Does he pretend to be professional?"  
  
"He's really cool. He's a good photographer." Mark said. "He makes working at a hyper hetero magazine managable."  
  
Sehun snorted. "That's because he's just a huge nerd disguised as a cool guy."  
  
Mark smiled, thinking about Jongin's goofy giggle when he talked about animals. "He's both a nerd and cool. Wish he'd stop with the 21 questions about me being gay, though."  
  
"He asks a lot of questions about you being gay? Straight boys are so extra." Johnny said the last part in English. He looked the most relaxed he had all day, focused now on the amusing topic of a clueless heterosexual coworker.  
  
"엑스트라?" Sehun didn't seem to understand the use of the English word extra in that context. Johnny explained it to him, looking animated and cheerful. It was a relief.  
  
"So what kind of questions does Jongin ask?" Sehun asked Mark after Johnny had concluded his English lesson. "He's known me since we were teenagers so it's kind of interesting that he's asking you questions when he's got me. Don't you think so?"  
  
Mark thought back to his converations with Jongin. Now that he was reflecting on it to answer Sehun, he realized Jongin's questions weren't nearly as bad as Donghyuk's. He just didn't like talking about them with a straight guy. "He just wants to know about my dating life and preferences and stuff. Now that I'm saying it I realize he's probably just trying to be a good hyung." Mark laughed at himself. "I guess I'm just not used to having this close of a relationship with a straight guy."  
  
"He probably wants to try and set you up with Sehun or something." Johnny said. "Some straight guys I know think every gay guy they meet is a potential boyfriend for me."  
  
They all laughed.  
  
"Jongin has never tried to set me up before." Sehun said. "He knows I don't need any help. He doesn't really ask me about guys that much, actually."  
  
"Mark can come across as deceptively helpless." Johnny teased, laughing into his coffee. "He probably thinks he needs him."  
  
"Hey," Mark whined. "I'm not that pathetic. He probably just was confused why I didn't go out with Jungwoo when he asked me out."  
  
"Jungwoo asked you out?" Johnny asked. He looked too curious for his own good. Mark felt guilty.  
  
"Yeah, but I told him and Jongin both I'm not looking for a boyfriend right now." Mark said.  
  
"Nothing if not consistent." Johnny said. He was definitely still a little sore about this subject.  
  
Sehun looked back and forth between Johnny and Mark with interest. Mark was not looking forward to what he would report back to Jongin on this.  
  
"How was Jungwoo's show the other night?" Mark asked Sehun, desperate to get the subject off himself. He could not wait for his clothes to dry.


	7. CHAPTER 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is now COMPLETE.

Baekhyun slurped down the jjajangmyeon in front of him, smearing black bean on his lips. Taeyong laughed and handed him a napkin, gesturing for him to wipe his face.  
  
Baekhyun snorted. "Guess I picked a food that isn't very sexy to eat."  
  
Taeyong just laughed. Baekhyun was effortlessly funny. He found himself laughing more than talking when he was with him.  
  
"So what made you want to be a dance teacher?" Baekhyun asked. He dabbed his lips with the napkin.  
  
Taeyong put his hands in his lap and shrugged his shoulders. "I like to dance."  
  
"That's it?" Baekhyun smirked. "No story?"  
  
"Well," Taeyong took picked up his water, staring down at the table. "I used to enter dance contests sometimes, in hopes of getting some extra cash. It was something I was good at and liked. I met Ten and he saw potential in me to work as an instructor."  
  
"What did you do before that?" Baekhyun asked, pulling another clump of noodles to his mouth and staring at Taeyong. It made Taeyong nervous when he looked at him like that. Like he was expecting a good story. A fun anecdote. Definitely not the heavy kind of tales Taeyong's honest past could weave for him.  
  
"This and that." Taeyong laughed into his cup. Why did dates always involve talking about your professional past?  
  
"Like a handyman?" Baekhyun teased. Taeyong clapped his hands in laugher.  
  
"No, I'm not very handy." Taeyong replied. "But it was pretty much just odd jobs, I guess."  
  
Baekhyun took a drink of water, washing down his latest mouthful of noodles. "Like if someone needs an emergency dancer to come to their house and entertain them?"  
  
Taeyong clapped again. When he was out of breath from laughing at Baekhyun he asked, "How is casting for the musical going?"  
  
"I know for sure I have Kim Minseok locked down for a major role. Do you can look forward to that." Baekhyun replied.  
  
"You guys are friends, right? He's a huge name right now." Taeyong said. It really was amazing that such a talented and successful star as Baekhyun wanted to spend any time with him at all. The fact that they were on a date was incredible.  
  
"Yeah, he's a good friend. He's resisted the urge to punch me this long so I'd say it's going pretty well friendship-wise." Baekhyun's face was full of amusement. He was so self-deprecating, but seemed completely unbothered by the negative things coming out of his mouth.  
  
"Why would he punch you?" Taeyong asked.  
  
"A lot of people want to punch me. For example, all of your friends." Baekhyun pointed out.  
  
Taeyong laughed. "They just don't want to see me get hurt. But you're already way nicer than most guys I've known."  
  
"Sounds like the bar's pretty low, then." Baekhyun snorted and poured himself some more water. "Mark and Ten seem nice."  
  
Taeyong grinned. "They are. Both of them are pretty wild, but really nice."  
  
Baekhyun choked on his water. "Mark is wild? I can't even imagine that."  
  
"When I first met him he was this adorable kid just completely plastered in a gay bar." Taeyong shook his head and chuckled at rhe memory. "He was being badgered by creepy men trying to get him to go home with them. He can be a dangerous combination of reckless and clueless. He's growing up a lot though. I'm proud of him."  
  
"You talk about him like he's your real little brother." Baekhyun smiled warmly. "He's lucky to have someone like that."  
  
"He needs someone like that. He can be so stupid sometimes." Taeyong said. He laughed and pulled noodles from his bowl. "He was such a cute kid, though."  
  
"He's a cute adult too." Baekhyun said, flashing his sharp canines. "Probably still a magnet for creepy guys."  
  
Taeyong nodded vigorously, eyes wide. "It's stressful being his hyung sometimes. He doesn't seem fully aware the effect he has on men." He chewed thoughtfully for a moment. "No, actually, he is aware. Which is probably more stressful."  
  
Baekhyun laughed. "How old is he? He'll probably be fine."  
  
"He's 21, but to me he'll always be that 16 year old kid that had too much to drink and can barely remember where he lives." Wearing a sweater five sizes too big and khaki shorts that looked painfully out of style. "I just want him to find someone who respects him, and doesn't just seem a doe-eyed cutie with a nice ass."  
  
"He looks so innocent." Baekhyun commented. "I would have never believed he had a wild streak."  
  
Taeyong snorted. "Oh, hyung, it's more than a streak. You should hear how he talks when he's not trying to behave himself."  
  
"What about you? Do you have a wild side?" Baekhyun asked, expression a little darker. Taeyong should have said something sensual and flirty, but instead he wheezed out a pitiful laugh. Baekhyun laughed too. It definitely felt like he was being laughed at, not with.  
  
"You're the opposite of Mark, aren't you?" Baekhyun, for all his puppy-like features, looked so smooth and flirtatious. "You look so sexy but you're shy. You look like you'd be a wolf, but really you're the one rescuing little kittens like Mark from wolves. You're unexpected too."  
  
Taeyong looked down, embarrassed giggle escaping his lips. Baekhyun, too, was unexpected.

Taeyong finished shedding his clothes and sat down on Baekhyun's bed. Baekhyun had also finished striping and he stared at Taeyong's body for a moment before speaking.  
  
"Wow, you're built really good."  
  
Taeyong laughed shyly. "People say that. I don't know. I'm kind of skinny."  
  
Baekhyun flashed his beagle smile, eyes still on Taeyong's body. "I wish I was 'kind of skinny.'"  
  
"You look good, hyung." Taeyong said. He reached out and took hold of Baekhyun's arm, pulling him towards him.  
  
Baekhyun smirked, eyes dark. "Don't lie." His voice sounded breathy. Aroused. Like he was so focused on Taeyong that he wasn't focused on insulting himself. He kissed Taeyong, straddling his lap.  
  
When Baekhyun pulled away from the the kiss, he was smiling at Taeyong. "What do you like? Can I ride you?"  
  
Taeyong nodded, sliding a hand down Baekhyun's back.  
  
"Then you'll need to give me a moment to grab some things." Baekhyun's sharp canines seemed more wolf-like than puppy-like in this light. The tables had turned. Taeyong knew how to seduce a man, but he liked Baekhyun too much for his own good. He was amazed Baekhyun hadn't deemed him too stupid and awkward to sleep with.  
  
But there was Baekhyun, crawling back onto the bed with lube and condoms, ready to ride Taeyong's dick. It was kind of miraculous.  
  
"Are your friends going to hate me more tomorrow morning?" Baekhyun asked.  
  
Taeyong's eyes lingered on Baekhyun's long, skinny fingers as they opened the bottle of lube. "They might. I know I won't."  
  
Later, when Taeyong had finished fucking Baekhyun during what was ostensibly a shower primary for cleaning, he felt Baekhyun lay his head on his shoulder as he rolled off the condom. "I'm glad I could give you a better night like you wanted." Baekhyun mumbled. Taeyong felt warm inside. He didn't deserve this, but he was thankful for it.  
  
"I'm glad you like me, at least for now." Taeyong replied.  
  
"I can't imagine not liking you, you're amazing." Baekhyun placed a peck on his neck and pulled away.  
  
"Do you have to get up early tomorrow?" Taeyong asked, turning to face Baekhyun. Baekhyun was finally putting some shampoo in his hair, smiling serenely.  
  
"Yes. Will you help me wake up?" Baekhyun asked.  
  
Taeyong nodded, enjoying how sweet and happy Baekhyun looked. "Of course, hyung." 


	8. CHAPTER 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is COMPLETE.

\

Mark sat two of Sehun's floor cushions out and happily reached for the snacks. It was cute to watch him; he always seemed so excited to enjoy the simplest things: snacks, TV, spending time with friends. His eyes sparkled just from unwrapping a cookie they had purchased downstairs. Jongin was happy too, of course. Happy to have two cute dogs cuddling with him. Happy to finally be able to hang out with Mark again. It was as if in a few short days he had already forgotten just how much he liked Mark. He felt warm seeing Mark's sweet smile and hearing him tell funny stories about the other men who lived on his floor.  
  
"Hyung, what should we watch?" Mark asked, chewing cheerfully on his cookie and looking over at Sehun's modest DVD collection.  
  
"Is there anything over there that looks good to you?" Mark scooted himself away from the table and over to the DVDs.  
  
"He likes action movies." Mark laughed, reading the titles. "Not much variety in genre."  
  
Jongin snorted. "That sounds about right."  
  
Mark pulled a movie off the shelf and began examining the back. Jongin glanced down at his phone.  
  
"Taeyong seems cool. I look forward to meeting him. He showed some cute old picture of you." Mark groaned.  
  
"Noooo. Hyung, are you serious?" Mark whined looking up from the box with a pout. "Is introducing you two going to be a problem?"  
  
"You had such a round little baby face when you were a teenager." Jongin said. He leaned his elbow on the table and sat his head on his hand. "You tried so hard to act cool though, didn't you?"  
  
"Taeyong is going to treat me like a kid forever." Mark sighed. "I'm not a kid."  
  
"I know. You really are manly and cool now."  
  
Mark smiled. There was that ornery spark in his eyes. "Manly, huh? That's an honor coming from a guy like you."  
  
Jongin could feel his eyes crinkle up as his smile grew. "You like manly guys."  
  
The mischief in Mark's eyes grew. "I do."  
  
"Am I your type?" Jongin said it in a teasing tone, but it was something he was secretly desperate to know. He thought he was, but the image of Johnny's massive arms still made him wonder.  
  
Mark made a show of cringing. It strung. "Why do straight boys always want to know that?"  
  
"What if I wasn't straight?" It wasn't direct, but it was still scary to say. Especially since he was already expecting rejection.  
  
"That would be awesome." Mark said, laugh in his voice. What?  
  
"Would it?" Jongin responded. Mark's eyes were still glowing with the same cheeriness they had before. He seemed completely unaware of the true meaning behind the question. Jongin's mind went in circles. Mark wasn't Taemin. But Mark might reject him. But Mark had already commented on him having a good body. But Mark had cringed when he asked.  
  
Mark had said something he hadn't registered.  
  
"What?"  
  
"I said this movie looks good. Let's watch it." Mark held up the cover for Jongin to see. "동창생".  
  
"No, before that." Jongin didn't really care which movie they watched anyway. He'd seen most of the movies on that shelf multiple times anyway.  
  
"I just said of course it would be awesome for me if another hot guy was gay." Mark laughed. "Straight men are always fishing for compliments, dang."  
  
"I'm not straight." He shouldn't have said it. No it was good he said it. But what if it was bad he said it. No it was -  
  
"Wait, for real?" Mark's eyes looked so round. His face was serious but still so, so cute.  
  
"Yes. I'm bisexual." Jongin sat up straighter.  
  
Mark stared. "Why didn't you tell me before?"  
  
"I'm not out to very many people." Jongin said. "I'm sorry."  
  
"So you like... like guys? Wait, what? This is such a surprise! I didn't pick up on it at all." Mark looked completely blindsided. Jongin supposed he shouldn't be surprised.  
  
"I'm sorry. I should have said something." Jongin admitted.  
  
Mark looked like he was solving an algebra problem in his head. Jongin watched as a slow smile formed on his mouth while the gears in his head turned.  
  
"So when you say I'm cute..." he started.  
  


"I think you're attractive." Jongin said quickly. He probably could have said that more gracefully. He wanted Mark to know. He wanted Mark to understand.

"Oh." Mark's face lit up with mischief. "So you probably don't want to watch a movie then." Something in his tone had changed. It sounded very... un-Mark.

Mark discarded the DVD box carelessly on the floor and crawled over to Jongin. "Do you want to have some fun, then, big boy?"

Big boy. So that wasn't a joke or a typo. Were they really going to do it just like that? No conversation other than Jongin finding him attractive.

Mark kissed him and his worries faded. The kiss was deep, deliberate... like someone who knew exactly what they were doing. He would have never expected this confidence from Mark.

"So what do you like?" Mark asked. His hand was on Jongin's neck. His voice was deep and sensual. "Do you like it rough? Do you like guys who pretend not to like it? What are you into?" He emphasized words like "rough', accentuating how dirty they were.

Okay. That was weird. "Uh, I don't... are those things you like?" Mark's dark eyes stared into his.

"Oh, of course you're the thoughtful type." Even that sounded filthy the way he said it. Mark kissed him again. It was messier this time. Jongin could feel Mark putting his hands under his shirt.

When he pulled away from the kiss, he was still staring at Jongin's lips.

"You're so sexy, Jongin. I'm going to make you feel so good." Mark purred. "I like getting fucked by big guys like you. Otherwise I'm open to whatever you want. What do you want?" Jongin stared at him in awe. He would have never have imagined Mark talking like this.

"I just want to be with you." Jongin said softly. There was a flicker of something different in Mark's expression, like a break in the façade, but it was quickly gone.

"So you want something more vanilla to go with that beautiful caramel skin?" Mark asked. Jongin thought maybe he now understood what that expression of mischief had been. He didn't know how to feel about it at the moment.

Mark started kissing down his neck and pulling his shirt up.

"Lift up your arms, big guy." Mark whispered in his ear as the shirt reached Jongin's armpits. When Jongin did as he was instructed, Mark nipped at his ear before pulling the Jongin's top off. Jongin realized he should have been taking Mark's clothes off too, but he had been too in shock to do so. He reached out for Mark's shirt, lifting it as well. Mark raised his arms for Jongin to take it off.

Mark's body was fit, but not as sharply defined as Jongin's. His little stomach was just as cute as Jongin had remembered. Mark slid his hands up Jongin's chest.

"So sexy. Exactly my type." Mark affirmed. Jongin couldn't help but feel victorious. He didn't have much time to think about the affirmation, though, because without warning, Mark was licking up his chest. His nipple ended up in Mark's mouth. He'd never been on the recieving end of that before. It felt really good, even when Mark bit at it. When he was finished with the nipple he kissed and sucked his way back down Jongin's chest. Jongin watched him, his sweet face doing all this without any hesitation.

Mark looked up at Jongin, his head near Jongin's crotch. "Are you going to fuck me? Do you have what you need?"

Condoms. Right. Up in the loft, under Sehun's bed.

"We need to go up to the bed." Jongin said. He must be coming off like he had no idea what he was doing. Mark was really throwing him off.

Mark grinned. "Sehun won't be mad if you have sex in his bed?"

"Not if I wash his sheets." Mark let out an ugly, devious laugh. "Okay, we'll wash his sheets."

Mark stood up and held out his hand for Jongin. Jongin took it and let himself be led up into the low-ceiling loft. The dogs watched them and barked as they asended the stairs.

Jongin, already on his knees because of the low ceiling, reached under the bed for the box Sehun had mentioned. He should have known it had more than just condoms; there were plenty of sex toys as well. Mark sat on the bed and gestured for Jongin to join him. Jongin sat the basket on the night stand.

"Do you want to see me naked?" Mark asked, unzipping his pants.

"Of course." Jongin replied. Did Mark even need to ask? Mark slipped off his pants and boxers. Mark's dick was hard and noticably bigger than Jongin's. He hoped Mark wouldn't be disappointed. He'd never had complaints from girls, but the differences between his previous sexual encounters and this one were already stark.

"Take off your pants. Let me see what you're packing." Mark said. Jongin stripped, Mark's eyes fixed on his lower body.

"Fuck, you could crush me with those thighs." Mark said. He pulled Jongin over to him and kissed him, pulling him on top of himself. Jongin kissed his way onto Mark's neck, sucking in the skin. Mark moaned, but it was theatrical, like he was a guy who watched too much porn. He seemed performing every step of the way, and Jongin wasn't sure what to make of it.

Jongin lifted his head to look into Mark's eyes. Mark winked. It was cute, and the most Mark thing he had done since all this started. Mark pushed Jongin so he could swap their positions. Mark made his way down Jongin's check again. Before Jongin had a chance to react, Mark licked his dick, eyes locked with Jongin's.

"Fuck, Mark."

"I've been told I'm pretty good at this. Let me know what you think." Mark said, stroking Jongin's dick.

Then, he deep-throated him. Like with kissing, this too seemed like an activity he was experienced with.

"Don't cum yet, sexy." Mark said after he removed his mouth. You gotta fuck me. Do you want want to prep me or do you want to watch me do it?"

Jongin stared at him. "I've never been with a guy before."

The lusty expression vanished from Mark's face. He looked concerned.

"I've never had sex with a girl before so I'm not really an expert on the differences." Mark told him. He smirked. "I definitely don't have a wet ass pussy. But I can show you what to do, okay? I've done this a lot."

"A lot?" Jongin had Mark pegged all wrong.

"A looooot." Mark purred. He reached over to for the basket. "How was the oral?"

Jongin was in completely over his head.


	9. CHAPTER 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is now COMPLETE.

Jongin sat his phone down on the nightstand and stared at the ceiling. Mark was sleeping peacefully next to him, belying the image of a man screaming in breathy, performative moans the night before.  
  
Mark stirred, and two round, innocent eyes fluttered open. He smiled at the sight of Jongin. "Good morning."  
  
This was Mark. Normal Mark, not sexy Mark. Jongin was overwhelmed with affection  
  
"Good morning." Jongin said. He leaned over and pecked a small kiss on Mark's lips.  
  
Mark beamed. "Do you want to make out with me?" He asked.  
  
"Of course." Jongin replied. He reached out and ran his fingers through Mark's hair. Mark's eyes sparkled with the same excitement they had when opening the cookie the night before. Jongin loved it. He loved Mark.  
  
Mark moved closer to Jongin and kissed him. He slid his hand down Jongin's chest, deliberately running his fingers over his nipple. Jongin lifted his arm to pull Mark's hand away. He felt Mark laugh into the kiss.  
  
Mark looked down at Jongin's hand on his wrist. "You don't want me to touch you?"  
  
Jongin let go of Mark's hand and hoisted himself up on his elbow. He lifted Mark's chin to make sure their eyes met.  
  
"I like you. A lot."  
  
Mark looked taken aback. "What do you mean by that?"  
  
"I like you." Jongin repeated, unsure how else to express it. "I want to date you. I want you to be my boyfriend."  
  
"I can't... I can't be your boyfriend." Mark looked... upset. Devastated, even. Jongin, much like the night before, found himself in shock.  
  
"Why not?" Jongin asked, blindsided.  
  
"I don't... I'm just not looking for that kind of thing." Mark replied.  
  
"Why did you sleep with me?"  
  
Mark visibly gulped. "You're hot... of course I wanted to sleep with you."  
  
Jongin sat up. He felt old emotions from Taemin's rejection swelling up inside him. "You should go back to your dorm. I need to clean up."  
  
"No!" Mark yelped, sitting up as well. Jongin looked at him, and there was silence moment Mark seemed to be working out what to say. "I'll help you clean up." He offered  
  
"You have homework. Get dressed." Jongin slid off the bed and picked up his pants and boxers.  
  
"I'm sorry." He heard Mark say behind him. He didn't turn around.  
  
"For what?"  
  
"For... I didn't know you liked me." Mark sounded pitiful.  
  
"Of course I liked you." Jongin said quietly.  
  
After Mark had left and the sheets had been put in the wash, Jongin plopped down on Sehun's floor, phone in hand.

Mark sat slumped over his desk, taping his pen on his keyboard. He was waiting for his supervisor to return from a meeting so he could have instructions for the day. Without warning, a pair of hands slammed onto his shoulders and there was a touch of lips on his cheek.  
  
"Donghyuk, I'm not in the mood for this!" Mark balled his hands up into fists. "If I stabbed you, my best friend would back me up that it was self defense."  
  
Donghyuk just giggled and walked to his desk. "You're just mad because you're starting to fall in love with me." He sing-songed.  
  
"I don't have the stomach for any of your straight boy bullshit today." Mark grumbled. "Or have you been secretly bi this whole time?"  
  
"Bi? What do you mean by that?" Donghyuk asked. Mark rolled his eyes and slumped back over.  
  
"Nevermind. I didn't think so." In a way, it was a relief that some things remained the same. The situation with Jongin may have been a dumpster fire but Donghyuk was still straight and annoying. "How's your girlfriend?"  
  
"Great! She thinks it's really cool that I'm an expert on gay people now, so thank you for that!" Donghyuk replied with far more pep than Mark was in the mood for.  
  
"Oh yeah, you're an expert. SLRK is going to start coming to you for tips." Mark said.  
  
"What's SLRK?" Donghyuk asked excitedly.  
  
Mark groaned and buried his face in his arms.  
  
There was a squeaking of wheels, then Donghyuk's voice was right next to him. "Are you okay? Did you drink too much this weekend? My girlfriend knows some hangover remedies!"  
  
"I messed up my friendship with Jongin." Mark mumbled into his arm.  
  
"What? I can't understand you!" Donghyuk tugged hard on the back of Mark's shirt collar, presumably in an ill-advised attempt to force him to sit up.  
  
Mark lifted his head and hissed in frustration, "I messed up my friendship with Jongin."  
  
There was a 'ping' from Mark's computer, alerting him of a new email. He reached out for his mouse.  
  
"What happened? Was he not okay with you being gay?" Donghyuk asked.  
  
"Not everything that happens to me is related to my being gay, Donghyuk." Mark clicked open the email from his supervisor, not really in the mood for work.  
  
"Then did you guys fight? It happens to straight guys all the time too, sometimes you have to fight to get everything out in the open." Donghyuk patted his back in what Mark assumed was supposed to being reassuring but felt more like an attempt to help him stop choking on food.  
  
Mark ignored Donghyuk and scanned the email for instructions.  
  
"Oh fuck." He said under his breath.  
  
"What?" Donghyuk asked, also looking at the screen.  
  
"My supervisor ok'd a project with me and Jongin for after Chuseok." Mark whimpered.  
  
Donghyuk scooted closer to the desk to see the screen more clearly. "That's great! The perfect chance for you two to make up!"  
  
Mark whined as he sat up, putting his fingers on the keyboard to craft a reply.  
  
"It's another modeling gig? Do they need anyone else? I think I'd be a good model, a better model than you. Ask him if I can do it too!" Donghyuk slapped the back of Mark's chair impatiently. Mark breathed out an irritated sigh and added Donghyuk's request.  
  
"Tell him I'd make a better model than you!" Donghyuk commanded, pointing at the screen.  
  
"No." Mark replied as he hit 'send' on the email. He picked up his phone and leaned back in his chair.  
  
"Wow! You have 12 dms on Twitter! Did you say something controversial?" Donghyuk asked. "Oh yeah, look: they're from Cherry Bomb fans. Once, I posted that Taeil from Cherry Bomb seemed lazy and I got so much backlash. But it was a compliment!" Donghyuk was leaning shamelessly into Mark's personal space. Mark turned his chair away from Donghyuk, trying to conceal his phone from Donghyuk's line of sight.  
  
He tapped open one of the messages. It appeared Cherry Bomb fans had found his Twitter account and wanted him to pass along messages to WINWIN for them.  
  
"They think I know WINWIN from Cherry Bomb." Mark mumbled. Donghyuk laughed far too loud, directly into Mark's ear.  
  
"Why would YOU know a kpop idol?" Donghyuk said. Mark rolled his eyes.  
  
"I've never met him, but I do have a friend who works with him."  
  
Donghyuk sunk his fingers into Mark's shoulders. "Wait, wait, wait! What?" He shrieked. "Do you think he could introduce me to Taeil? Taeil is my favorite singer! Have you heard him sing?" Donghyuk began shaking an unamused Mark by the shoulders. "Did you know he was accepted to Hanyang University? He's smart AND talented! I want to BE hivm!"  
  
"I don't know. Ten hasn't even introduced me to WINWIN so I don't know how likely him letting me introduce a friend to another member is." Mark told him, opening another message.  
  
"Is he working on WINWIN's solo then? Do you have any spoilers you can tell me? I won't tell! I'm great at keeping secrets. I didn't tell a single person you were gay except for my girlfriend and my parents and like 3 classmates."  
  
"I don't know anything." Mark resisted the urge to cuss out the user who had sent him nudes to show WINWIN and simply blocked them instead.  
  
"Does your friend also know WINWIN's choreographer?"  
  
Mark decided to block a couple of the other users who had messaged him as well. "My friend is his choreographer."  
  
"Mark are you serious?" Donghyuk sprang out of his chair and walked around in front of Mark to look directly at his face.  
  
"You friends with the mysterious choreographer? He's like best friends with WINWIN!" Donghyuk yelled into his face. "What can you tell me about him? I know A Twosome Place is their favorite coffee shop."  
  
Mark looked up from his phone. "What? Ten's favorite coffee shop is... wait. Where did you even hear that?"  
  
"From the internet, Mark! Have you been paying any attention?" Donghyuk was looking at Mark like he had just said he didn't know who the president of Korea was.  
  
"Apparently not. Guess I know why all these Cherry Bomb fans are messaging me then." Mark said.  
  
There was another 'ping' from Mark's computer, reminding him that despite how shitty he felt, he was still at work. He turned his swivel chair back to his computer.  
  
"Did he give me permission to be a model?" Donghyuk asked excitedly as Mark clicked into the email. So much for a quiet Monday. 

The air had the cold bite of fall in it as Mark stood outside the building waiting for Jongin. It occured to him that perhaps Jongin wouldn't show up. He could have found a reason to leave early or stay late, deciding that ultimately he wanted to avoid talking to Mark. Mark pulled out his phone and scrolled through Twitter, leaning against the side of the building.  
  
"Hey." Mark looked up to meet eyes with a melancholy Jongin. Mark focused a smile at him, wanting to lighten the mood.  
  
"It's good to see you." Jongin looked away. He looked too serious, intense.  
  
"I shouldn't have slept with you. It was selfish." Mark said. He looked down, scraping his Converse sneakers on the sidewalk. "I don't want you to not be in my life anymore."  
  
Jongin stayed silent. It was like he was suffocating Mark with his quiet anger. Mark took a deep breath and wrapped his arms around himself, feeling chilly.  
  
"Are you cold?" Jongin asked, finally turning his gaze back to Mark and looking him over. "Is your sweater not warm enough?"  
  
"I'm fine." Mark said. "Thanks for caring. I know I don't deserve any of your time... but thanks. For this."  
  
"Don't say stuff like that." Jongin said. "You're not undeserving of my time."  
  
Mark looked at Jongin's intense expression and smiled, genuinely this time. "You're such a good person. Anyone would be lucky to date you."  
  
"I used to think that about you, too." Jongin muttered.  
  
It was like being punched, but maybe Mark deserved to get punched. "You don't think that anymore, though?" It didn't need to be a question, but it slipped out as one anyway.  
  
"I don't feel like I know you anymore." There was a pain Jongin's expression.  
  
Mark nodded, pushing back the hurt he felt so he could respond. "You still know me. There's just parts of me I hadn't shared with you yet. I'm sorry. Do you still want to get to know me?"  
  
It almost looked like Jongin might cry. Mark felt uncomfortable and cruel.  
  
"I might like you too much." Jongin said. "I'm going to want to date you."  
  
Mark hugged himself. He was being faced with a terrifying choice. A relationship... he didn't even know how to have one. He might be a terrible boyfriend. But losing Jongin... "What if we tried dating? Just see what happens."  
  
"Are you serious? Don't say that if you're not serious." Jongin's eyes were shaking. Mark wanted to hug him. He supposed he could, if they were dating.  
  
"I'm serious. I'm kind of scared -" Mark laughed. "-but I'm serious."  
  
Jongin bit his lip, and reached out to put his hand on Mark's cheek. "Don't be scared. Why are you scared? Am I scary?"  
  
It was so sweet and so, so sexy. Mark grabbed the front of Jongin's shirt and kissed him. It was dumb, it was reckless, but it was so nice to feel Jongin melt into the kiss.  
  
Mark broke the kiss, restind his head against the wall. "Do you want to go to a DVD방 with me?"  
  
Jongin blinked. "Why?"  
  
Mark batted his eyes in faux innocence. "Why do you think?"  
  
Jongin snorted. "Wouldn't we be more comfortable in a motel?"  
  
"Oh, I forgot what a big spender you are." Mark teased, playing with the front of Jongin's shirt.  
  
"You're just cheap." Jongin said. He was finally wearing a small smile.  
  
"I'm a very cheap date." Mark said, sliding his arms around Jongin's neck. "And I'll let you fuck me whenever you want."  
  
"You're so wild." Jongin wrapped his arms around Mark's waist. He leaned forward and gave him a quick peck. Mark followed his lips as he pulled back, wanting a longer, deeper kiss.  
  
"I probably shouldn't make out with an intern right outside the office." There was a laugh in Jongin's voice.  
  
"That's a good point." Mark glanced at the entrance, imagining the horror of a superior happening upon two very not out employees.  
  
"Do you want to get dinner?" Jongin asked, pulling away from Mark. He unzipped his bag. Mark grinned at him, raising an eyebrow.  
  
"What?" Jongin asked as he took out his phone. "I can look up some place around here."  
  
"I don't want to eat dinner, but I do want to eat." Mark said. Jongin glanced up from his phone.

"Oh, you want more like a snack?" Jongin asked. He started rapidly putting something in his phone.

Mark laughed, smiling growing. "No. You probably don't want to know what I have in mind."

"What do you mean?" Jongin looked up again.

Mark put his hands in his pockets. "I want to eat you."

Jongin stared at him for a moment. "I should have known. Well, I'm actually hungry."

Mark sighed. "So boring."

"Sehun is out of town until tomrrow. We can go to his place after." Jongin said, scrolling on his phone. "How does bibimbap sound?"

"Like torture." Mark joked. Jongin laughed. 


	10. CHAPTER 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is COMPLETE.

"I can't believe I might have to do a photoshoot with Donghyuk." Mark shook his head, taking a drink of water. "That guy gets in on everything."  
  
Jongin laughed. "You were the one that asked for him."  
  
"He'd never leave me alone if I didn't."  
  
Jongin grinned looking at Mark in amusement while chewing his bibimbap. "He never leaves you alone anyway."  
  
"What are you saying?" Mark replied. "That I DON'T want Donghyuk to drop dead, thus freeing me from his unrelenting questions? Wow, Jongin you have an active imagination." Jongin chuckled.  
  
"I'm saying you're a nice person." Jongin clarified. He took another bite from his spoon and watched Mark as he chewed.  
  
Mark stared back for a moment, thoughfully scooping up rice into his own spoon. "I wasn't nice to you. I definitely wasn't nice to Johnny."  
  
"Do you mind me asking what happened with Johnny, exactly?" Jongin asked, eyeing Mark even as he pushed a collection of rice and veggies onto his spoon.  
  
"You pretty much already figured it out." Mark didn't really want to go over all the gory details of how their friendship had disintegrated. "He wanted to date me, I wanted to just be friends with benefits. It didn't work out."  
  
Jongin picked up his glass and gulped down some water. He didn't look at Mark. "Why didn't you... want to date him?"  
  
"I just didn't want a boyfriend." Mark said. He stabbed at his bowl with his spoon. "I don't really want to talk about it on our first date."  
  
"Our first date?" Jongin asked. He still had food in his mouth, but had stopped chewing to gape at Mark.  
  
"I mean you're feeding me. You're going to fuck me. I hope." Mark explained, now feelind unsure. Maybe this didn't count as a first date. Johnny had fed then fucked him plenty of times... but he shouldn't think about that right now.  
  
Jongin just chuckled, resuming his meal. "Are you always like this? I didn't notice before."  
  
Mark crossed his arms. "Like what?"  
  
"Wild, I guess."  
  
Mark snorted. He leaned in closer to Jongin and whispered, "You just make me horny."  
  
Jongin choked. "Do you always talk like this?" He gasped out.  
  
"Not to straight boys." Mark replied. He sat back more naturally in his chair. It was enjoyable watching Jongin get so flustered. He was generally so cool and swauve, it was fun to know Mark could throw him off. "I'm glad you're not straight."  
  
Jongin's face softened. "I'm glad you're dating me."  
  
That reminder made Mark feel anxious, but he pushed the worries away. He didn't need to think about the repercussions right now.  
  
"Do you feel like a foriegner now?" Mark teased. "Dating but not a couple?"  
  
Jongin scrunched his brows together. "Are we not a couple?"  
  
Mark looked down at his picked-at dinner. "Not yet." He mumbled. "I'm not really yet."  
  
"Okay." Jongin didn't sound happy about it, but he didn't press the issue either.  
  
Mark filled the uncomfortable silence that followed by chugging down some water. He felt guilty, but he was already giving him a lot more than he had even given Johnny. Johnny, who had bought him a keyboard so he could practice songs that didn't work as well on a guitar. Johnny, who had taken him on a vacation to America so he didn't have to see his family during Chuseok. Johnny, who had peppered Mark's face with kisses one morning, begging him to be his boyfriend. Mark had still said no. Mark knew he was an asshole, but he also knew that he was giving Jongin as much as he could, right now. More than he thought he could, a 24 hours ago.  
  
"Your English must be pretty good, right?" Jongin finally asked, graciously changing the subject.  
  
"That's right." Mark said. To his surprise, Jongin looked at him blankly. He translated, "맞아요."  
  
Jongin nodded vigorously, like he retroactively understood what Mark had said. "You should teach me."  
  
"You must have learned some English in school." Mark pointed out, wondering if Jongin just felt intimidated by the language.  
  
"My family was poor when I was growing up, and I was the youngest. So I never got a chance to go to an English academy." Jongin explained. "And when my parents started getting a better income, they spent it on dance classes."  
  
And now he couldn't dance. Jongin had a lot of sadness in his past, it seemed. "I can help you learn English. You can teach me how to take good photos."  
  
"A lot of it is having a right equipment and lighting." Jongin said modestly. Mark smiled.  
  
"You're such a good person." Mark told him.  
  
Jongin beamed. "I like you." He said.

"Don't make so much noise this time." Jongin said after he had pulled off Mark's pants and underwear. He pecked a kiss on Mark's ankle.  
  
"I don't think anyone will hear anything." Mark replied.  
  
"I want to hear what you sound like naturally." Jongin flashed him a smile that made Mark's eyes go wide.  
  
"I'll try to be sexier this time." Mark said, as if he was accepting scathing criticism on something he had lovingly created. Jongin laughed.  
  
"You don't need to try. Just be Mark." He leaned down and kissed Mark gently. When he pulled back and beamed down at Mark, Mark said, "I am Mark. What do you mean?"  
  
Jongin reached out and brushed his thumb on Mark's cheek. "Yes. And I like Mark. Don't worry, just try to be a quieter okay?"  
  
Mark nodded. He didn't seem as guarded, right now. He was staring up at Jongin with those innocent, round eyes. It was cute, and maybe Sehun had been right, about just telling Mark what he wanted.  
  
Mark had stretched himself last time, but this time he guided Jongin through the process. Jongin made sure to consistantly ask if what he was doing was okay, if Mark felt alright.  
  
"Whatever you could possibly do wrong, I'm sure I've experienced worse." Mark told him. It had sounded like it was perhaps a joke, but Jongin did not like the implications of that statement.  
  
When Jongin thrust into him, he he slid his hands onto Mark's threading their fingers together. Mark gazed up at Jongin, trying far harder than Jongin had intended for him to to choke back any and all sound.  
  
Mark snuggled up to Jongin after they had finished, and picked up Jongin's hand, playing with his fingers. "Was I better this time?" He asked. Jongin looked at Mark's profile, concerned.  
  
"You didn't do anything wrong." Jongin assured him. "I just wanted you to be yourself."  
  
Mark kept his eyes on Jongin's hand, lifted in front of his face with Mark's smaller fingers. "I am myself. I just want to make it fun for both of us."  
  
"I want that too. I'm sorry if I made you feel insecure." Jongin pulled there hands over to his face, kissing the back of Mark's.  
  
"You didn't." Mark put on an unconvincing air of confidence. "You're the one who should feel insecure. You have no idea what you're doing!" Mark teased, looking at Jongin with his eyes squeezed into adorable crescents.  
  
"I guess I should be asking how I did then." Jongin couldn't help grinning back. Mark was so precious.  
  
"Hmm... how DID you do?" Mark made a show of thinking and stroking his chin. "Maybe like... a B+?"  
  
Jongin laughed and picked up a pillow, threatening to hit Mark with it. "B+?!" Mark cackled and pushed the pillow away.  
  
"I'm being generous because I like you." Mark smiled deviously.  
  
Jongin lowered the pillow. "You like me?"  
  
Mark continued to smile. "I guess I do."  
  
Jongin kissed him. Mark saying he liked him was the best thing he'd heard all evening. He was lost in enjoyment of deep kiss when he heard the code to the apartment being punched in below them, followed by barking dogs. Had Sehun given the code to someone else? Chanyeol probably had it, but there was no reason for him to come to Sehun's apartment.  
  
Sehun's voice greeted the dogs and Jongin sat up. Mark's eyes were wide with concern. Sehun began griping to the dogs about Jongin leaving things at his apartment and not turning off the lights. Jongin slid off Sehun's bed and quickly started dressing himself. He felt Mark's hands pull him back toward the bed by his shoulders.  
  
"I thought he wasn't coming back until tomorrow!" Mark hissed into his ear.  
  
"I thought he wasn't." Jongin replied quietly. He resumed fastening his pants. On the nightstand, Jongin's phone vibrated. Sehun was probably trying to call him. Jongin closed his eyes and sighed. It wasn't like there was any way around this.  
  
"I'm up here." Jongin called. He heard Sehun make a startled sound below. "I'm with Mark." Mark covered his face and fell back onto the bed in humiliation.

"Oh." Sehun replied. He sounded confused. Jongin supposed that made sense. "Do you two need a minute?" His question was dripping with annoyance. Jongin was definitely going to get told off.

"Yes, I'm sorry." Jongin called back.

Once he and Mark were dressed and the three men were all seated downstairs together, Jongin braced himself for anger.

Instead, Sehun calmly asked. "Why didn't you answer your messages?"

Jongin didn't want to talk about this in front of Mark. "I was busy." He lied.

"Having sex with Mark?" Sehun looked at Mark. Mark appeared slightly traumatized, staring at the floor with a shocked expression.

"No. I'll talk to you about it later. I'm sorry." Jongin replied.

"I was worried about you." Sehun said. "I thought it was going to be like..." His eyes shifted back to Mark for a split second. "Last time."

"Last time?" Jongin asked.

Sehun pursed his lips. "You're right. We should talk about this later. Order us a pizza and clean my apartment."

Jongin did as he was told, and Mark helped with picking up and putting the sheets in the wash.

"You have back up sheets while those are washing, right?" Mark asked Sehun earnestly while Sehun leaned against his kitchen counter sipping tea.

"Of course." Sehun replied. He stirred his tea and looked Mark over. "Did you show Jongin a good time?"

Mark stared back at Sehun, looking like a deer in headlights. There was a weird energy between them Jongin didn't know how to read.

"Mark, the pizza's going to be here soon." Jongin called, wanting to rescue Mark from whatever was happening with Sehun. "Can you grab some plates?"

"Yes, plates!" Mark turned around to look at Sehun's cabinets. "Where does he keep the plates?"

Sehun walked up behind Mark and reached over his shoulder to open the cabinent right in front of him. He stayed like that for a moment, and it almost looked like he whispered something in Mark's ear.

Jongin thought that maybe he understood some of the weirdness between Sehun and Mark now.

"Stop hitting on Mark." Jongin called from where he was tying up a trashbag. "We're dating now."

"Oh really?" Sehun turned back towards Jongin, face smug. "When did that happen?"

"Today." Jongin said. He pointed at Sehun. "So don't flirt with him." Mark turned around, holding the plates.

"Can we, like, not tell anyone else yet, though?" Mark requested apologetically. "I'm not ready to talk about it with people. Like. Right now." He looked at Jongin with concern. Jongin nodded. It sucked in a way, but Jongin was also not really in a place where he was ready to tell others about having a relationship with another man.

"Of course." Jongin assured him. Mark gave him a small but grateful smile. Jongin smiled back. The doorbell rang. It was a loud and irritating jingle.

"It's the pizza. Answer the door." Sehun orderd when neither Mark nor Jongin moved. "And take out the trash. I'm not dealing with that."

Mark heard the dreaded squeak of wheels behind him and braced himself for Donghyuk's inevitable question. 

"How was your date last night?" Donghyuk asked directly into Mark's ear in what was decidedly not a whisper. 

Mark heaved out a sigh and continued typing the email he had been composing. "It was okay. I regret telling you about it."

"Why?" Donghyuk replied, casually squeaking his chair left and right next to Mark. "I'm your friend! We still need to drink together sometime." He stopped twisting his swivel chair and grabbed the arm of Mark's chair. "We should do a double date! My girlfriend wants to meet you."

"I'm good." Mark replied. It was hard to proofread his email with Donghyuk's incessant chatter.

"Come on, it will be great! We'll get so much closer. And my girlfriend loves gay people." Donghyuk assured him. His eyes lifted over Mark's head. "Jongin, tell Mark he should go on a double date with me and my girlfriend."

Mark instantly lost all interest in the email he was proofreading. He spun his chair toward the entrance of their cubicle so quickly he heard the back of his chair hit Donghyuk. Good riddance.

"Who would Mark be going on the date with?" Jongin asked. He was beaming at Mark, eyes bunched up into smiling crescents.

"His date from last night! So probably some muscular dude." Donghyuk told Jongin. Mark snickered and gave Jongin a knowing look. Donghyuk stood up and leaned over Mark. "What do you have there?"

"Kimbap and coffee for Mark. I thought he might need a snack." Jongin said, handing over the coffee cup and foil-wrapped kimbap to Mark. 

"Why didn't you bring me anything?" Donghyuk whined. He plopped back down in his chair and craned his neck over Mark's shoulder. "You knew I'd be here."

"Sorry, only Mark gets presents today." Jongin shrugged and didn't look the least bit remorseful. "Did Mark tell you anything else about his date last night?"

"No." Donghyuk huffed. "Can I at least have half the roll of kimbap? I'm hungry."

"I made it for Mark so it's up to him." Jongin said. Mark gasped as he pulled open the foil.

"Hyung, you made this? You're so cool." Mark looked at the kimbap in awe. Due to the absence of chopsticks, he used his teeth to pull the top slice of kimbap into his mouth.

Donghyuk slapped Mark's shoulder. "Mark, let me have some. I want to try it." 

"Is there tuna in here?" Mark pointed at the roll while he chewed. "Hyung you worked so hard." He grinned at Jongin. "You're such a nerd."

"How does working hard make you a 'nerd'? You keep using that word." Donghyuk griped.

"Yeah, why am I a nerd, Mark?" Jongin asked, voice giddy.

"Don't worry about it. Thanks for the food, hyung." Mark winked at him and continued eating. Donghyuk looked back and forth between the two of them.

"Am I missing something?"

Mark stuck a slice of kimbap in Donghyuk's mouth to shut him up.

"We should get back to work. I'll see you later, Jongin?"

"Yeah, definitely." Jongin waved. "Later Mark."

Donghyuk scoffed around the kimbap in his mouth. "He was being rude."

Mark smiled at the gifts in front of him. "Shut up, Donghyuk." 


	11. CHAPTER 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is now COMPLETE.

Mark wore his typical face of mischief as he traced the outline of Jongin's muscles. "Thanks for bringing me here. Even if we got turned away at the first place we went to."

Jongin scoffed and shook his head. "I'm still angry about that. That shouldn't be allowed to happen. I'm sorry you had to experience something like that."

"I've experienced worse homophobia than that." Mark snickered. He laid back on his pillow and stared up at the ceiling. "It's cute that you're so protective of me, though. He was being a jerk to you too."

Jongin turned his head on his own pillow to look at Mark's profile. Mark appeared to be glaring at the ceiling, as if it were the one that had wronged him. Jongin rolled onto his side and put his hand on Mark's shoulder. "You shouldn't have to deal with stuff like that." He rubbed his thumb on Mark's soft skin. 

"His loss. He won't let in same sex couples, he won't get our money." Mark shrugged. He looked at Jongin again, face softer. "Thanks for today."

Jongin snorted. "Are you thanking me for having sex with you? We're dating."

"Yes, but you were a really good listener. You did exactly what I asked." Mark took the hand Jongin had on his shoulder into his own and hoisted himself up on his side as well. "I'll definitely be sore tomorrow."

Jongin frowned. "I didn't want to hurt you."

"No, it's a good thing. I want you to make me sore." Mark giggled and squeezed Jongin's hand. "You're the coolest guy I've ever slept with."

Jongin raised his eyebrow. "Not the coolest guy you've ever dated?"

Mark broke eye contact. "You're the only guy I've ever dated." He smiled shyly.

"Why?" Jongin asked. Mark sighed. He pulled his hand away from Jongin and gestured vaguely.

"It's just... a lot." He said, still not looking at Jongin's face. "There's a lot of extra stuff you have to do when you date someone."

"Like what?"

"You have to introduce them to people. You have to celebrate special dates." Mark explained. He fell onto his back, putting his hand over his eyes. "And there's just… a lot of pressure."

"Pressure?" Jongin asked. "How so?"

"I don't know. It's hard to explain." Mark took a deep breath, chest lifting visibly.

"Well, I'm honored to be the first person you've ever dated." Jongin wanted to ease the obvious tension Mark was feeling.

"Nooo." Mark whined. He sighed again, perhaps even heavier. The hand that had been over his face fell to the side. "Don't say that. That's too much pressure."

"There's no pressure. You don't have to do or be anything for me." Jongin assured him. He didn't entirely understand what "pressure" Mark was referring to, but he didn't want to be the source of any of it.

It must have been the right thing to say, because Mark looked at him gratefully. "Thanks, Jongin." 

He then groaned, as if realizing something. "Have I been putting pressure on you?"

"No! None!" Jongin said quickly. "Mark, don't be so hard on yourself. This isn't a big deal."

"I don't even know how to date someone." Mark mumbled. Jongin patted his shoulder.

"There's nothing to know. We're already doing it." Jongin said. It was hard to see Mark being so hard on himself, and wjile being unable to completely understand why.

Mark looked at him, eyes earnest and innocent. It was moments like this where he felt like the "real Mark" rather than the Mark he put on to try to appear a certain way. Truthfully, some of what Jongin had originally thought were the "real Mark" were part of a façade too. But those round, sweet eyes… that was real.

"Thanks Jongin. I'll try to be a good person to date." Mark after looking at him for a long moment.

"Oh, Mark." Jongin reached out to cup his cheek. "You already are." He pulled Mark into a hug, rubbing his back.

Jongin held Mark's hand as they exited the motel. Mark snickered as they walked out the door, covering his face with his free hand. "You're so sweet, but so cringy."

Jongin smirked and kissed the back of Mark's hand. "I make you cringe?" Mark sighed happily and watched Jongin lower their hands once more.

"Yes, you're such a nerd." There was no bite in the words at all, it didn't even sound like teasing. It sounded purely affectionate.

"What do you want to do now? Should we go to a coffee shop for you to do your homework?" Jongin asked as they walked, directionless.

"No." Mark mumbled. "I better go back to my dorm and work." He looked up at Jongin for a moment before letting go of his hand and holding his arms open for a hug. Jongin happily wrapped his arms around Mark. 

"Thanks for dicking me down so hard." Mark whispered into his ear when they embraced. Jongin scowled and pulled one of his hands off Mark's back to pinch his ear.

"Your mouth is so dirty." Jongin said to Mark. Mark winced at the pinch and pulled away, giggling.

"I'll wash my mouth out with soap when I get home." He joked. He pulled Jongin back into a hug.

"I'll text you, hyung."

"You'd better."

Jongin felt Mark's chin rest on his shoulder as he scrolled through a list of restaurants in Hongdae. He looked over at him and smiled. "I'm excited to meet your best friend."

"He's excited to meet you. He's probably going to be different than you expect." Mark said, nuzzling in closer.

"How so?" Jongin asked. His tone was playful, but Mark still looked completely serious.

"He's actually really shy." Mark explained. He pointed at a place on Jongin's screen. "Do you like Italian? That play has really good carbonara." 

"Pasta?" Jongin asked. He felt Mark nod on his shoulder. "How was he shy if he was a drug dealer?"

Mark pulled away and shushed him, glancing around the metro car. "Don't mention that."

Right. That was a pretty illegal thing to just casually discuss on public transportation. Jongin wrapped his arm around Mark and pulled him close again. "Sorry. Yes, we can do pasta. Do they serve good alcohol there?"

Mark grinned. "Just the typical stuff. We can go somewhere after if you don't like it."

Mark was looking at Jongin's face, no longer his phone. Jongin turned to lock eyes with him, meeting a smile with a smile. Mark placed his hand on Jongin's knee. "This is almost like a real date."

"It kind of is, except that your best friend will be there." Jongin teased, rubbing his hand on Mark's shoulder.

"He's really important to me." Mark continued to make eye contact with Jongin, looking deceptively angelic. "He's like the only real family I have in Korea."

"I'm glad I get to meet him then." Jongin put his phone to sleep and slipped it into his pocket. He squeezed Mark's arm. "I wonder what he will think of Chanyeol."

Mark tapped his fingers on Jongin's knee. "How did you and Chanyeol even become friends?" Mark asked.

"I don't know, we went to the same high school." Jongin looked at the black train window across from them, his mind drawing up the old memories of how he and his best friends had become close. "Sehun and I were really good friends and Sehun had a huge crush on Chanyeol. He'd try to get him to hang out with us all the time. Chanyeol was tall, handsome, and in a band so I was kind of surprised he even gave us the time of day." Jongin laughed, recalling how bratty, scrawny first year Sehun had tried to act aloof around the third year he had basically begged to hang out with them. 

Mark smiled and replied cheekily, "You seem to like guys who can play instruments."

Jongin laughed and slapped Mark's arm with his free hand. "What are you saying?"

"You wanted to hang out with a cool third year who was in a band, you wanted to hang out with me because I play guitar." Mark observed. Jongin leaned in closer to Mark's face.

"I don't like you just because you're in a band." Jongin told him. Mark grinned back, eyes dropping to Jongin's lips.

"Oh really." Mark said. Jongin resisted the urge to lock lips with Mark in public. He vaguely registered a train announcement as Mark flicked his eyes back up to meet his.

"We missed our stop." Mark said, eyes sparkling without a hint of regret.

Taeyong was more handsome in person than in the pictures Jongin had seen. He was slightly taller than Mark, but skinner. He had large, manhwa protagonist eyes but the rough skin of someone who had lived a hard life. His intimidating appearance gave way to a soft and affectionate smile as Mark approached, holding Jongin's hand.

"Mark, he's so handsome!" He heard Taeyong mutter to Mark after they had been introduced. Mark shyly scratched his neck.

"I heard you used to -" Jongin saw a look of concern flash across Mark's face as he began to speak. "-like to write music." Jongin corrected.

"Still do sometimes." Taeyong said, oblivious of Jongin's near misstep. "Mark's the real talent, though."

"Bullshit." Mark scowled at Taeyong. "You do most of the writing and composing."

"Mark's a really good rapper." Taeyong told him. "You two should go to a norebang together sometime."

"Sounds like a great opportunity to fuck." Mark said crudely. Taeyong laughed like Mark had just said something endearing. He didn't seem the least bit like a criminal, at least not when talking to Mark.

Taeyong was generally pretty quiet, except for when he whispered things to Mark like a giggly teenager. Mark had a softness that felt more genuine with Taeyong. Like he had let his guard down a bit, soothed by the comfort of a safe friend. Jongin wanted to be someone like that for him as well. He wondered if he ever would be.

"Why do you always try something weird?" Mark asked in amusement as he watched Taeyong pick at the bizarrely seasoned pilaf he had ordered. 

"It sounded interesting." Taeyong defended. He scooped another spoonful in his mouth and made a face. Mark scrunched up his face in laughter.

"Here, have some more of the carbonara." Mark forked a generous helping of his own food onto Taeyong's plate. Taeyong smiled in thanks and began scarfing down the pasta Mark had given him. They really were like brothers.

"How long have you two known each other?" Jongin asked after watching them both crack up as Taeyong forced a spoonful of the pilaf into Mark's mouth.

"Uhm." Mark screwed the lid off a soju bottle, looking thoughtfully at the high restaurant ceiling. "Five years? Four and a half maybe?"

"That sounds about right." Taeyong replied. Mark filled up a shot of soju and handed it to Jongin.

"That's so wild that it's already been that long, hyung." Mark slid a shot to Taeyong as well.

"Time really flies." Taeyong agreed. He held up his shot. Jongin held his up as well. "Geonbae!"

After dinner, Jongin texted Chanyeol to meet them at the Playground with Toben. He couldn't hold back his giggles as Chanyeol approached with the tiny, spirited poodle.

"Hi baby!" Taeyong knelt down and held his hand out to Toben.

"Do you want him?" Chanyeol asked. He sounded grumpy.

"I can't take him, sorry." Taeyong lifted his big manhwa eyes apologetically to look at Chanyeol. "He's really cute though."

"Hyung, Chanyeol is the token straight boy in Jongin's circle." Mark teased. Taeyong laughed and Chanyeol sulked.

"Jongin used to be straight." Chanyeol huffed.

Taeyong and Mark snickered. "I don't think that's how that works, bro." Mark said.

"Have you had any luck finding Toben a home yet?" Chanyeol asked Mark.

"No. Sorry." Mark was rubbing Toben's belly. It made Jongin want to melt. He knelt down as well and placed his hand on Mark's back.

"He rolled over for me, hyung!" Mark boasted. He was adorable, and looked so happy. Genuinely so. Jongin flashed him a bright smile and hugged him close.

"Of course he likes you. You're both so cute."

"Ewww." Mark cringed and lightly shoved Jongin's arm. Jongin heard Taeyong laugh on the other side of Mark.

"Why can't Mark take him again?" Chanyeol asked.

"He lives in a dorm, Chanyeol." Jongin said. "What are you going to do with him over Chuseok?"

Chanyeol sighed heavily. "I have to take him to my mom's house. It's going to be a nightmare. Will you take more pictures of him for me?"

"Sure, maybe next week before Chuseok." Jongin replied.

They walked the streets of Hongdae with Chanyeol and Toben. The neighborhood wasn't as lively as they would have been on a Friday night before the pandemic, but the absence of large crowds made walking Toben easier for Chanyeol. Taeyong and Chanyeol chatted excitedly about music composition once they realized they shared a common interest.

"I didn't expect the two of them to get along so well." Mark whispered to Jongin as they made their way back toward the metro station.

"Chanyeol makes friends easily." Jongin said. "And Taeyong seems really kind."

Mark nodded. "I'm so glad you met him. He really is."

"I wish you could go home with me." Jongin said once they had reached the escalator down to the metro.

"Can I?" Mark asked. He batted his eyes innocently, but his question had no innocent implications.

"I don't know how my mom would feel about that." Jongin admitted. "And you can be kind of loud."

"You know I can be quiet when I need to." Mark pointed out. It was true, but Jongin still new better than to take someone to his parents' house for sex.

"Jongin, I'm going to head home." Chanyeol cut in. Jongin was startled, forgetting to consider that Chanyeol didn't even know he was dating Mark.

"Right, thanks for coming, hyung." Jongin fist bumped Chanyeol who then waved goodbye to Taeyong and Mark.

"I'll text you later, Jongin." Chanyeol said meaningfully as he left.

"I'll let you two say your goodbyes." Taeyong said, giving Mark a hug. He whispered something in Mark's ear that made him flinch and scrunch up his face.

"Hyuuung!" He whined quietly to Taeyong.

Taeyong let out his loud, awkward laugh and bid them farewell. 

Mark looked embarrassed as Taeyong walked away. He cleared his throat before speaking again, "We don't have to do much. I can just sleep over." He regained his flirtatious air from earlier. "And I could suck you off too, if you want."

Jongin reached out to cup his cheek affectionately. "Maybe you can. If we just sleep."

"I'll try my best to behave." Mark said. It didn't sound like he intended to try at all. Jongin pinched his cheek.

"Don't try. Behave." He said firmly.


	12. CHAPTER 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is now COMPLETE.

Sneaking into a boy's house after dark was not something Mark had experienced before. There was a certain thrill to tiptoeing to Jongin's room with the lights out. As soon as Jongin had gingerly shut the bedroom door behind him, Mark tugged him down into a kiss.

"Mark, hey…" Jongin stretched his neck away from Mark, avoiding more kisses. "Not now. You promised."

Mark snickered. "I can't believe you believed me. I get to be alone with a guy who looks like you and you expect me to behave?"

"We're not really alone. My parents are here." Jongin sounded pitiful. Mark decided he could show him a little mercy. He patted Jongin's chest.

"Okay, big boy. But if you change your mind I will happily do whatever vanilla shit you want." Mark expected an amusing face of indignation, but instead Jongin pressed his forehead against Mark's. 

"I like you a lot. What can I do to make you my boyfriend?" Jongin whispered. His eyes were full of a vulnerability that Mark didn't know what to do with.

"Let me go down on you right now." Mark replied, using the request to ease his own nervous tension. Jongin's expresion, however, remained the same.

"Mark. I'm serious." Jongin said. Mark didn't know what to do. He was terrified. It was pathetic, but he truly was scared. He gulped, trying to find a response that fit what Jongin wanted to hear, but none came. He just stared back, into those soft eyes, at a loss for words.

"Nothing?" Jongin asked after a long and empty pause from Mark.

Mark kissed him. He knew he could make men happy physically if nothing else. But Jongin wanted more. Jongin wanted things Mark had never learned how to share with a partner. It was unsettling.

Jongin let him kiss him. Maybe he could feel what Mark was feeling, even if Mark didn't know how to express it. He desperately didn't want to break Jongin's heart, even if he felt like it was probably an inevitability.

"We should go to bed." As Jongin turned towards his bed, Mark grabbed his arm.

"I'll do it!" He said a little too loudly for a sleeping household. When Jongin looked over his shoulder at him, Mark reiterated at a lower volume, "I'll be that. I'll be your… I'll be your boyfriend."

Jongin smiled. It was gentle and perhaps a bit sad, but caring nonetheless. "It's really fine, Mark. Don't worry about it. Let's just go to bed."

He didn't seem mad or resentful in the least, which made Mark feel even worse. When they cuddled onto the bottom of Jongin's bunk bed together, Mark stayed awake a while after Jongin had fallen asleep. 

He hugged Jongin's teddy bear against his chest. His heart hurt. He had never let himself feel this much fondness for someone he was involved with. Jongin showed him such unabashed affection and vulnerability it made it hard to push away emotional attachment. He fell asleep with his face buried in Jongin's teddy bear, nose filled with the soothing smell of Jongin. 'This might be what love feels like' was his last thought before drifting off.

He woke up to the sounds and smells of someone making food in the kitchen. Jongin was still next to him stroking Mark's hair and scrolling through trending articles on his phone. Mark watched him quietly for a while before he sat up so he could put his chin on Jongin's shoulder. Jongin smiled at him.

"Good morning. Sounds like my mom's making breakfast." Jongin said, wrapping his arm around Mark.

"Smells good." Mark said. He stared at Jongin's handsome profile as Jongin returned his attention to his phone. His golden skin looked especially beautiful in the early morning sunlight. Mark wanted to kiss him. Just on the cheek. But it seemed so tacky.

There was a knock at the door.

"Come in, Mom." Jongin said, eyes still on his phone. 

When the door opened, a predictable expression of confusion crossed Jongin's mom's face followed by a predictable question: "Who's this?"

Jongin met his mom's eyes. He removed his arm from Mark.

"This is the intern I was telling you about. The one coming for Chuseok." Jongin said. His voice might have shaken for just a second.

"Is there a problem with the top bunk?" Jongin's mother asked. Concern mixed with the confusion on her face.

"It was very comfortable, thank you for asking." Mark lied quickly, sparing Jongin an explanation. "Jongin was just showing me something on his phone."

Mrs. Kim nodded. She didn't look entirely convinced, but she didn't press the issue either.

"Breakfast is ready." She told them. She added to Mark, "I apologize if there isn't enough, I didn't know Jongin was having you over."

"It's okay, I apologize for the inconvenience." Mark gave her his best pastor kid smile. "Thank you for your hospitality."

Mrs. Kim seemed effectively charmed, and returned to the kitchen. Jongin giggled after she had left.

"You're good with mothers." Jongin said. Mark put his arm around Jongin.

"I'm much better with sons." He replied, making sure the statement sounded every bit as dirty as he intended it. Jongin shoved him away as Mark cackled.

At breakfast, Mark did his best to behave like the earnest and innocent intern Jongin had taken under his wing. He boasted about how Jongin had given him quizzes to improve his skills and put in extra hours after work to mentor him. His mother looked proud, and Jongin looked embarrassed and amused.

"Jongin, have you met any more nice girls at work?" Mrs. Kim asked as they finished their rice.

Jongin snorted. "Don't pry."

"I just want to see you happy." Mark could tell she really meant it, and there was a twinge of guilt in his heart.

Mark and Jongin spent the morning taking photos and walking around Jongin's neighborhood. It was close to Itaewon so after Jongin badgered Mark about trying Canadian food. They found a Canadian restaurant for lunch and enjoyed gravy slathered smoked meat and french fries.

After they had texted with Donghyuk, Mark asked that they go to a multi방 to get away from the crowds.

"If he tells people I'm going to be so mad." Mark grumbled. He was driving recklessly in Mario Kart, but it was refreshing to not have to be careful. A nice fantasy, the ability to be as reckless as possible with minimal consequences.

After they had played for a few rounds, Mark decided to make better use of the three hours they had rented the room for and straddled Jongin's lap.

He ended up riding him, biting back sounds for the sake of the employee whose desk was directly outside their room. His head was up, enjoying the pleasure of the moment, but when he dropped his gaze to Jongin's face he found the other man watching him a sweet and gentle expression. It was too much to handle. Mark buried his face in Jongin's neck, sucking love bites into his tan skin as he bounced on his lap.

There was a thrill of marking him, showing that no one else could have him. Possessiveness was not a familiar feeling, but right now Mark wasn't going to question it. 

Once he had finished into the condom he had worn to reduce the mess and felt Jongin jerk through his own orgasm beneath him, he lazily pulled off his lap and slumped next to him on the multi방 couch.

"I don't work out enough, my legs hurt." Mark whined. He went about carefully removing the condom, feeling the slight soreness in his thighs as he did so. He hadn't ridden someone like that in a while.

"We still need to do a synchronized swimming class." Jongin pecked Mark's forehead and slid his arm around his waist.

"Do you really want to do that?" Mark asked.

"If it's with you, I'd do anything." Jongin replied. He looked a little out of it post-orgasm. It was cute. Still cringey, but cute. Mark smiled.

"Ew." He said. He kissed Jongin, slow and sloppy. There was an unnecessary amount of saliva getting on his face, but he didn't care. 

The bus back to Jongin's home was crowded, so Mark sat on his lap. They looked through the pictures of Mark on Jongin's DSLR while the bus bumped and swerved. Mark laughed and cringed at his modeling, but had to admit Jongin truly was excellent at photographing people.

"Mark's spending the night again." Jongin told his mom as they reentered his home. His mom looked back and forth between the two of them.

"He can't go back to his dorm?" She asked.

"I can, but I'd like to spend more time with Jongin, if that's okay with you." Mark said sweetly when Jongin hesitated to respond.

His mother smiled. "What have you two been up to?"

"Jongin's been teaching me how to model." Mark told her, taking the DSLR over to her to show her some of Jongin's shots.

"It's really nice that he's taken you under his wing." His mother said looking at the camera. "Aren't you worried you're burdening him by taking up too much of his time?"

Mark flinched. He was very familiar with the passive aggressive mother schick but he didn't know how to answer her.

"I want to do it, mom." Jongin finally spoke. "It isn't a burden."

"But you could be spending this weekend more productively, don't you think?" Mark looked over at Jongin for some kind of cue for how to manage this situation.

"It was productive. Mark is a good model and he's helping me build up my portfolio." Jongin said. He walked over next to them and looked at the preview on the camera as well. 

"I'm thinking of entering a juried show." Jongin told her. "Look how great his expressions are."

His mother sighed. "I just want to know that you're at least thinking about finding another girlfriend."

Mark sucked in air. It was a really uncomfortable topic for her ro bring up in front of Mark. He realized this probably wasn't going to improve, that this was likely Jongin's mother's attempt at letting him know he was not welcome to stay another night.

Mark opened his mouth to say he should probably be working on homework anyway, but Jongin spoke first.

"Can we not talk about this when we have a guest?" Jongin said. "You don't have to worry about cooking, we'll order food. I'll make sure there's no burden, okay?"

"I don't mind cooking, Jongin, I'm just concerned." His mother said gently.

"Please don't be. Can we go to my room now? I want to show Mark how to use Lightroom." Jongin replied. His mother actually did look genuinely concerned, but she let them go.

Instead of a Lightroom tutorial, the pair cuddled on Jongin's bed and walked video clips on Jongin's phone. It was clear Jongin needed a distraction from the negative energy from earlier.

"I'm sorry." Mark said after a while, chin on top of Jongin's giant teddy bear.

"For what?" Jongin asked, scrolling through videos of poodle puppies.

"For upsetting your mom." Mark said. Jongin put his hand on Mark's shoulder and squeezed it.

"You didn't do anything wrong." Jongin said. "I knew it would be like this. I like you enough that I decided not to care." 

"I'll be your boyfriend." Mark offered again. Jongin didn't look up from his phone.

"It's okay, you really don't owe me anything." Jongin said dismissively.

"Jongin, I…" Mark wasn't sure why it felt like there was a pressure on his chest, trying to restrict the words he desperately wanted to say from coming out. "I… actually… really want… it. I want… to be your… boyfriend."

Jongin looked at him this time, but Mark could tell he still didn't believe him. "You really don't have to."

The pressure was getting heavier, but that only made Mark want to push harder against it. "Jongin, I'm saying this because I want it. I'm nervous but I still want to try."

Jongin looked cautiously happy. "Really?"

"Really."

"You're really sure?"

"As sure as a slut like me can be." Mark joked. Jongin laughed.

"I like you so much, Mark."

"I like you too." Mark beamed at him. Jongin seemed lighter, happier, like he had successfully chased off the dark cloud that his mother had put over him. Mark kissed him.

It was so tacky, but this might really be what love felt like.

"It's not English, it's Latin." Mark said in a teasing voice, looking up from his phone.

"What?" Jongin asked, not expecting the question. Mark smiled.

"It doesn't matter. You don't need to learn any English for me, you know." Mark said. He sat his phone on Jongin's desk and focused more fully on his boyfriend. "You can be as Korean as you want. You can even call me Minhyung. I don't usually let people call me that."

Jongin could feel the delight that spread over his own face. "I want to learn English from my Minhyungie." He cooed. Mark scrunched up his face in disgust. He smacked Jongin's shoulder.

"The way you said that was so gross!" He said, continuing to hit at Jongin.

"You don't have to call me hyung, you can call me Jonginie." Jongin said, relentlessly gushing his affection on Mark. Mark wiggled in playful discomfort. Jongin kissed him on the cheek. Mark kissed him on the lips.

Jongin let himself give in to the kiss entirely, gently lowering himself and Mark down to make out on his bed. He cupped Mark's face as he kissed him, stroking his cheeks. He felt Mark slide his hands down his shirt and onto his hips before shoving them back up, this time under his top. Mark really did have a one track mind. Jongin wished he could indulge him and was considering what he could get away with when he heard his mother's horrified voice.

"Jongin!"

Jongin sat up abruptly, bumping his head on the top bunk. His mother was standing at the door, holding a plate of orange slices she had presumably brought in an effort to apologize for her behavior towards Mark earlier. 

The disappointment on her face was at a level he hadn't seen for years. He smoothed out his shirt, staring at her, unsure of what to say. He felt paralyzed by the traumatic memories that expression brought back.

"This is my fault, I'm sorry!" He heard Mark say. It was such a thoughtful effort, but completely meaningless when Jongin had been just as into the kiss.

"I think Mark should go home now." His mother's voice was stern, but it still shook a little when she spoke.

"We're drunk, we've been drinking in here!" Mark lied desperately. He didn't want to cause Jongin in trouble. Jongin loved him so much.

"Mark, go home now." She said. Jongin winced. He had to do something. This wasn't like before. Nothing was like before. Mark liked him, he had more than one friend who knew he was. He slid off his bed and stood next to Mark who had already quickly hopped off the bed while making his ill-conceived excuses. 

"I'll go with you Mark." Mark looked up at him. He looked wide eyed and lost, like a deer in headlights. Jongin grabbed a duffle bag and began grabbing things he might need for at least a few days away.

"Jongin, what are you doing?" His mother was starting to sound more panicked, voice getting shakier.

"You're kicking out my boyfriend, I'm going with him." Jongin said. He tried to sound matter-of-fact, but he avoided making eye-contact because he actually felt like crying. He picked up Mark's phone and backpack and handed them to him. Mark appeared to be frozen with shock. 

After Jongin had finished packing, he grabbed Mark's wrist and pulled him after him, pushing past his mother in the doorway. He didn't have to be a disappointment to her this time. He could just walk away. His mother called after him. It sounded like she was crying. It was painful to hear, but he was far too committed to this to turn back now.

Once they were on the sidewalk outside, Jongin finally began to cry. He felt resistance from Mark and turned to see that he had stopped walking.

"Jongin." He said. His face still looked so terrified, like a small animal that had just barely escaped from a close brush with death. "What… how… are you…" He couldn't seem to finish a thought. He finally closed his mouth and pulled Jongin into a hug. Such a kind act caused Jongin to completely lose his grip on any remaining composure. He sobbed into Mark's shoulder, and Mark rubbed his back, completely silent.

Jongin cried until his head hurt. Mark probably thought this was all about what had just happened, not years of pressure and disappointment from his family. Mark probably blamed himself. Jongin tried to speak a few times, but always ended up back in tears, any words that came out sounding garbled and incoherent. He must have looked pathetic from Mark's calm foreigner perspective. 

Mark bought Jongin a water bottle and an apple before they got on the train. He held Jongin's hand tightly as they rode, fingers intertwined.

Jeno looked up from his desk when they arrived at Mark's dorm room. 

"My boyfriend needs a place to crash for the night, I hope you don't mind." Jeno nodded. He was clearly aware from their faces of the severity of the situation. 

"I can crash with Renjun and Jaemin if you two need to be alone to…" Jeno seemed to be trying to read the vibe of the situation in front of him. "...talk about something?"

"It's okay, Jeno." Mark said. "We don't want to burden you." 

"Nope, not burdening me. I have a new Switch game I wanted to try out with the boys anyway." He was already out of his chair and shoving things into his backpack.

"Really, Jeno, we don't -" Mark started.

"Nope. It's no problem. I hope… whatever happened… gets solved?" Jeno looked at them as if he was checking to make sure it had been the right thing to say. Mark smiled thinly.

"Thanks Jeno. Me too."


	13. CHAPTER 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is now COMPLETE

"Jongin, I'm sorry." Mark mumbled miserably as Jongin slid into bed next to him. "I fucked everything up."

Jongin's head still hurt. He didn't feel like talking. But he couldn't let Mark continue to beat himself up.

"It's not your fault. I'm sorry you had to see that." Jongin pulled Mark into him, hugging him like his teddy bear. "I'm glad to be here with you."

Mark wiggled in Jongin's grip so he was facing him, their faces so close that their noses touched. "I shouldn't have kissed you there. I should have listened."

"It doesn't matter. Don't blame yourself. She already knew I was bi." Jongin said. He kissed Mark's forehead. 

"Oh." Mark sat on the bed quietly, looking at his feet.

Jongin heard his phone vibrating again. His mother had been trying to call for a while now, and had even enlisted his sisters to bombard him with calls as well. He turned off the ringer. Then, after his phone lit up several more times with calls, he decided to turn off his phone entirely.

"Do you want to watch a movie on my laptop?" Mark asked after a long silence. Jongin nodded. Anything to take his mind off of what had happened until he could sleep off his headache.

Jongin woke up to fingers tapping gently on his chest. He looked next to him to see Mark watching him, chin in his hand.

"Good morning! Do you want to get breakfast?" Mark greeted. His smile was a mix of sweetness and sympathy.

"I feel like shit." Jongin said. He still had a headache, he didn't feel much happier, and he was groggy from sleep.

Mark's expression turned more serious. He lifted his head off his hand. "Do you need anything? I can run to the store and grab whatever you need."

Jongin reached out and intertwined his fingers with Mark's. He wasn't above acting a little extra pitiful when his boyfriend was doting on him. "Don't leave. I want to be with you."

Mark beamed. "Okay, why don't I text Jeno? What would you like him to bring?"

"Can he bring painkillers and water?" Jongin asked. He put his free hand on his forehead. He was probably dehydrated. 

"We have painkillers but he can definitely bring water." Mark squeezed his hand then let go so he could grab his phone. "You probably need to eat too. Want samgak kimbap?" 

"Mmm. Sounds good." Jongin said. Mark was already texting obediently on his phone. He did know how to date someone, even if he didn't realize it. He was earnest and loyal. A perfect boyfriend.

"If you come to the kitchen with me we can brew some shitty coffee." Mark looked sidelong at Jongin while he texted. Jongin couldn't help but smile. Just a little. Mark was as adorable as ever.

Jongin draped his arms over Mark's shoulders while Mark brewed coffee for him. The tiny dorm kitchen was cluttered, and there was a cleaning duty schedule posted for the month of July that had apparently not been updated since. Jongin tried not to think about how long the coffeemaker had gone without being cleaned. At least Mark washed it out first.

Jongin was sitting at Mark's desk drinking coffee when Jeno came in with Mark's requested purchases. Mark offered to pay him back but Jeno insisted on covering the costs. The way Jeno looked at him suggested Mark had filled him in on some details of the situation in exchange for the snack run.

Jongin did feel a bit better after eating and taking some painkillers. He realized, looking at Mark's desk, that there were a lot of things he still didn't know about his boyfriend. Mark's writing utensils were in a mug with the Vancouver skyline on it. There was a tiny pride flag and a Canadian flag in the cup. Next to it was a picture of a happy family. Mark's family. He had an older brother.

Mark didn't talk much about his family or Canada, but both appeared to be important to him. There was also a stack of papers with guitar chords, a loose guitar pic and a tuner sitting on top. He'd seen Mark use them when he was here before.

"Do you need anything else to eat?" Mark asked from where he was sitting on his bed. "We haven't really had anything since that poutine at lunch yesterday."

"We should get noodles." Jongin answered, looking at the photo of Mark's family. "Does your family know? About you?"

Mark was quiet. Jongin turned to look at him. He seemed to be considering how to answer.

"You don't have to answer if-"

"No, it's fine. We haven't talked about it. They might know. I don't try that hard to hide it. I just don't talk about it. It's hard to be around them, because I know they wouldn't approve. So most of the time I just… don't." Mark said. His voice had an edge to it, like this was a situation he wanted to detach himself from as much as possible.

"Don't what?" Jongin asked. 

"Don't try with them. I just kind of steer clear." Mark said. He crossed his arms. "It's fine."

"You must miss them." Jongin said. Maybe it was the wrong thing to say. But it was interesting that he still had their picture.

Mark looked down. "I… do. I just got sick of answering girlfriend questions and feeling like I needed to be a good boy for the family."

"When I told my mom I was bi she said I still needed to marry a woman." Jongin said. He didn't know what else to say, but he knew he related on some level. "She feels like I've embarrassed the family a lot already. This was probably like the final nail in the coffin for her."

"I'm sorry." Mark said. "I never meant to mess things up for you."

Jongin snorted and took a sip of the gross dorm kitchen coffee. "Things were already messed up. Maybe I don't care about pretending they're not anymore."

Mark gave him a pained smile. "You're a lot braver than me. I admire you."

Jongin chuckled into his coffee mug. "Is it brave to get outed against your will?"

"You had already told her, though." Mark replied. "I never came right out and told my family 'I'm gay.' I don't think it would go over well. But you were strong even when your family didn't take it well."

"I wasn't strong at all the first time." Jongin said. He finished off his coffee and got up from the desk so he could sit by Mark again. "Thanks for taking care of me, Minhyungie."

Mark stomped his feet on the floor, cringing. He leaned away and covered his face as Jongin tried to hug him. "I can't believe I let you call me that."

Jongin knew he had to turn his phone back on eventually. He had to go back to work tomorrow, and he might need to answer important emails or calls before then. He also needed to figure out a place to stay that wouldn't continue to put Jeno out. The first step was just to turn his phone on. He glared down at his phone and hesitated.

Mark pressed up against his side, taking a drink out of the bottle of flavored soju they were sharing. Mark wrapped his arms around Jongin and squeezed.

"Don't worry. You don't have to listen to any of the voicemails." Mark reassured him. Jongin leaned into the hug. Mark was doing an impressive job of making Jongin fall even more in love with him today. 

The endless string of vibrations following the phone booting up was to be expected. Jongin laid his phone face down while it belatedly but diligently alerted him to all his missed notifications. He took the soju from Mark and chugged down a large gulp. Mark rubbed his arms and watched him supportively.

"There are going to be so many voicemails." Jongin said. He stared across the room to Mark's closet and took another big drink.

"All of which you can delete." Mark reminded him. "You don't have to listen to them." 

Jongin sighed heavily. "I don't want to just never talk to them again." He realized, as the words were coming out of his mouth, that Mark might think that was a diss on his own family relations. He was too stressed to tell if the sad look on Mark's face was hurt or sympathetic.

"I know. But you can wait until you're ready." Mark told him. Jongin sighed and picked up his phone again. It buzzed a few more times as the last of his apps finished loading. There were of course messages from Sehun and Chanyeol. He had a couple emails from coworkers and some twitter notifications (Donghyuk and Mark's usual frenemies banter). 

"11 voicemails. I honestly expected worse." Jongin held his phone in front of Mark to see. They were mostly from his mom and sisters, but there was one from his dad and one from Chanyeol. They had likely been roped into the calling frenzy by his mom. "I'm kind of curious what Chanyeol has to say." He sucked in air and hit play on the message. He put it on speaker so Mark could hear too.

_ Hey Jongin! It's your best friend, Chanyeol. Your family is really worried about where you went. Maybe you could just give them a quick call? I don't know what happened but it seems like they really want you to come home. What's going on? You can tell your cool hyung anything!  _

_ (Bark bark)  _

_ Shut the fuck up, Toben, no one cares!  _

_ Anyway… give me a call back when you can and definitely tell your parents where you're at! Bye! Gotta see what this fluffy little bastard wants. [CLICK] _

"Dang, poor Toben." Mark said. Jongin snorted. "Sounds like your mom hasn't been telling anyone what happened."

"She's too embarrassed." Jongin grumbled. "She wants to just sweep this under the rug and act like it was just a petty argument that got out of hand."

"It'd be more embarrassing for an adult man to go AWOL over a petty spat with his mom." Mark said. His tone was light and joking. He was trying to ease Jongin's stress. 

"I guess to her this IS just a petty spat." Jongin said as soon as the thought occurred to him. "She doesn't understand why I won't conform." 

"You shouldn't have to conform." Mark mumbled, looking down at his hands. 

Jongin leaned down so he could look directly into Mark's downcast eyes. He wanted him to know he wasn't planning on giving him up. "I'm not going to." Mark gave him that shy and sweet smile that always seemed genuine. Jongin kissed him before bringing his attention back to his phone.

"I should probably listen to some of these. I also need to call Sehun about staying with him so I don't have to put Jeno out." Jongin said. He scrolled through the voicemails. His mom's messages would probably be stressful. "I'm going to step out for a minute."

"Wait!" Mark said as he started to stand up. "It's okay if you stay here! You'll be at work during the day and we can hang out in other places so Jeno can be in here too." Jongin gave him a toothy grin.

"Just say you'll miss me." He teased. He loved that Mark was being like this. He wanted to soak it up. Mark picked up his pillow and smacked Jongin with it.

"Go make your calls." He said. Jongin kissed him once more before heading out the door. 

Out in the hallway, Jongin looked at his phone, deciding what to listen to first. He clicked on one from one of his sisters first. She sounded more concerned than angry. Two boys walked by chatting in Chinese while he listened, both eying him with curiosity. He wondered if Mark's group chat was about to hear about him again. 

When his sister's message ended, he looked at the list again. His finger hovered over his mother's most recent message a moment before he clicked. He closed his eyes and braced himself for a fallout.

_ Jongin! I'm serious. Stop this and come home. Don't you have any shame? You're making - _

Jongin stopped the message and swiped to delete it. He felt unsettled, but he also wasn't going to let her stop him. He loved Mark. She'd have to deal with that. He took a moment to collect himself, then called Sehun.

_ Jongin. Shit. Thank fuck. _

"Yeah, good to talk to you too." 

_ Any updates? Sorry your family is being so stupid. _

"Not really. I'm hoping I can find a place fast."

_ I texted my landlord and there is a place on the 2nd floor that opened up recently. Can you come by tomorrow afternoon? _

"I'll talk to my boss. That's fast. Are you sure it's a good place to live?"

_ Ha. Ha. Apparently people aren't moving as much right now because of the pandemic. You picked a good time to give your family the middle finger. _

"I guess. My mom is really pissed."

_ Her problem, not yours. How's Mark? _

"He's so been amazing, Sehun."

_ [Retching] Okay, gross. Well, thanks for calling. See you tomorrow? _

"Yeah. Thanks Sehun. You always cheer me up."

_ Yeah, because I'm your real best friend. Later. _

Jongin smiled when he hung up. This situation was shit, but as long as he had Mark and Sehun he'd be okay.

  



	14. CHAPTER 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is COMPLETE

Mark was apprehensive as he accepted the call from his father. In spite of his anxieties, however, warmth swelled in his heart as the familiar face appeared on screen. It had been so long since they had spoken face-to-face, even over skype. 

"Dad! I missed you!" Mark exclaimed in English to the man on the screen.

"I missed you too, son. It's been a while. How are you holding up in Korea?" His father was smiling warmly. There were stress lines around his eyes that, perhaps, hadn't been there before.

"It's not too bad. The pandemic sucks, though." Mark replied. He glanced over at Jongin, who was sitting on his bed, likely following roughly none of the conversation. He smiled supportively at Mark nonetheless.

"Yeah, it sounds like Korea has it under control, though. How is your friend you hung out last Chuseok? Johnny, was it?" There was something in the way he asked… something that suggested…

"He's alright. But, uh… there's kind of something I need to talk to you about." Mark played with his ear, glancing at Jongin again. When he looked back at his father, the man's face was heavy with concern. Mark sucked in air.

"I, uh. I'm gay, Dad. I actually… well, uh, yeah. I guess that's really it. I'm gay." Mark watched the pixelated image of his dad closely, for any sign of a positive or negative reaction. His father nodded after a moment. Maybe he had been waiting to see if Mark said anything else. Maybe there was just a lag in the feed.

"I… know. I mean, I figured. Your uncle overheard some of your conversations with that drug dealer you used to have over." His expression was serious. It was hard to tell much beyond that as the image quality had worsened.

"You knew?" Mark gulped. "And he knew about… Taeyong?"

"Yeah, he said you ran with a rough crowd. That's why I wanted you to apply for schools here." His dad confessed. "But when you got into a SKY university… I couldn't really say no."

"Taeyong's not really… uh, sorry, the guy that used to sell drugs... he's probably the reason I'm at a good school, safe and healthy." Mark explained. He folded his ear in and out. "And he's pretty antidrug now, for what it's worth. He's never wanted me to do drugs or anything dangerous, really. He's a good hyung."

"I'm glad to hear that. I heard some pretty concerning things. I was praying for you a lot." Mark's dad smiled, but his eyes still looked stressed. Mark gulped.

"I think… Taeyong might have been an answer to your prayers. Honestly. He shielded me from a lot, Dad. I don't know what would have happened to me if it weren't for him." Mark forced a smile, trying to illustrate just how okay he was. There was another pause from his father.

"I hope I get to meet him." His father finally said. "I was very worried about the drug use, alcohol abuse, and dangerous sex life your uncle suspected you of having."

Mark made a pained expression. It wasn't entirely wrong, but it was also probably overblown in his father's mind.

"I haven't… I've done some reckless things. But I'm not… I'm doing okay." Mark looked over at Jongin. "I have a boyfriend now. He's a really good guy."

"Oh. Is it that Johnny?" His father asked. The question seemed neutral. Mark didn't know how to gauge his reaction to this news.

"No, Johnny was just a friend. This guy is my first boyfriend." Mark said. He wanted to know if he was going to be rejected or not. "How do you… feel about that?"

"I… I would like to meet him. See if he's really a good guy." Mark's dad responded. That didn't answer what Mark was really asking.

"Is it… okay? That I have a boyfriend? That I'm gay?" Mark probed. He had to know. He needed the band-aid ripped off.

"Of course it's not what I would have picked for you… being gay. It's a hard life. But life rarely goes how we plan, doesn't it?" He answered. "I'm glad you found someone."

"You… this is… really okay with you?" Mark couldn't quite wrap his head around what his father was saying.

"The world has changed a lot, Mark, and I've changed too." His dad told him. "I'm sorry I ever taught you things that made you believe it wasn't okay to be who you are. I've definitely had to unlearn some things in recent years."

Mark felt tears beginning to form in his eyes. "Dad…"

"I love you, Mark."

Jongin, noticing Mark was crying, got up from the bed and pulled Jeno's chair up beside Mark so he could wrap his arm around him. He had no way of knowing if these were good tears or bad tears.

"I love you too, Dad." Mark choked out.

"Who is… is this the boyfriend?" His dad asked. Mark nodded and switched to speaking in Korean.

"This is Jongin. He doesn't speak very much English. He's… yeah… he's my boyfriend." Mark smiled through his tears at Jongin and explained, "He's okay with it. He wants to meet you."

"Are you a university student as well, Jongin?" His father asked. It was just like he was being introduced to an opposite sex significant other. It now seemed foolish that Mark had waited so long to tell him. Of course, he didn't know what had gotten his father to the point of acceptance. Maybe this had been the perfect time for him to come out.

As he and Jongin laid in bed to sleep later, Mark smiled into his boyfriend's chest. Even though the call had been positive, Mark still felt emotionally exhausted after summoning the strength to share a secret part of his father. He had never expected to be accepted. Though being gay had been a reality to him for a long time, it only now felt truly real for him. His father knew, and he accepted him. He was no longer a collection of splintered identities spread across different areas of life. He felt for the first time closer to a whole, complete person. He was a gay man, and that finally felt completely okay. He felt relieved. Freed. He hoped one day Jongin could experience this as well.

It was a longer wait than usual for the train to arrive after Jongin and Mark left Sehun's apartment with their lunch. Jongin stood behind Mark with his hands in Mark's front pockets, enjoying the shy smile the act earned him. It seemed like Mark had gotten cuter and softer over the last few days, especially after the call with his father. He was getting used to Mark's wild side, but it was nice to see that soft, genuine side of him that didn't hide from affection or sincerity.

A large, bulky man approached from where he was standing a ways down the platform. He looked curiously at Mark and asked him something in English.

"Oh… I was at Sehun's. We used his kitchen to make lunch." Mark answered in Korean. He sounded uncomfortable. The man looked familiar. He was gigantic. Mark's type.

"Ah, I see." The large man said, still sounding confused but switching to Korean. Jongin appreciated Mark subtly assuring that he could follow the conversation. The man turned his attention to Jongin.

"I don't think we've met. I'm Suh Youngho." He said. His tone wasn't entirely friendly, and he seemed to be sizing Jongin up.

"This is Johnny. You saw his twitter post. He's friends with Sehun." Mark explained. He reached his hands up and stroked Jongin's arms. Johnny's eyes dropped to watch the action, expression cold. "This is Kim Jongin. He's, uh… my boyfriend." Mark's voice went up at the end, like he was uncertain how Johnny would respond. Johnny flicked his eyes back up to Mark's.

"Boyfriend? Really? You?" He asked. His tone was teasing disbelief, but there was a bitter edge to it.

"Yeah." Mark stared at him. "I… hm. I'm sorry."

Jongin knew, looking at the face Johnny made, that the feeling of victory that surged through him was completely cruel. Johnny was, perhaps, a wonderful person. And Jongin clearly had no reason to be jealous of him despite his hulking figure.

"Huh." Johnny replied. He was sizing Jongin up again. Jongin flashed him a smile that he hoped didn't look petty but probably did. Johnny narrowed his eyes a little and patted Jongin on the shoulder. "Congrats on taming this little monster."

"Oh, please. You liked that I was a monster." Mark teased. There was a touch of flirtation that Jongin didn't love, but he ignored it.

Johnny shook his head, a smirk on his face. "Good luck with this guy, Kim Jongin."

Jongin pulled his hands out of Mark's pockets and wrapped his arms around Mark, sitting his chin on his shoulder.

"Aw, baby are you jealous?" Mark asked. His voice sounded so much sweeter than it had before. Johnny scoffed and turned to watch for the train.

"No." It wasn't entirely true, but Jongin wanted to act cooler than he felt about Mark's not-ex. Mark giggled and lifted one of Jongin's hands so he could give it a kiss. Butterflies chased Jongin's jealousy away. Take that, Johnny.

On the train Mark sat snuggled in close to Jongin. He grabbed Jongin's arm to wrap it around his shoulders. Johnny sat a couple seats down from them, arms crossed. Jongin did feel bad for him. 

"What are you doing for Chuseok?" Jongin asked him, trying to ease some of his tension.

"Going to hang out with some other foreigners and probably get completely shitfaced." Johnny answered neutrally, not looking at Mark and Jongin.

"I told you Johnny's American right?" Mark asked Jongin.

"He looks American." Jongin replied, still in awe of Johnny's overall largeness. "He's so big." Mark laughed, face scrunching up in amusement.

"He's big everywhere. Aren't you, Johnny?" Mark said meaningfully. Johnny smirked, and Jongin felt less bad for him. And maybe hated him a little.

Later, when they were sitting in the park eating the pajeon and japchae they had spent the morning preparing, Jongin finally asked, "Do you wish I was bigger?"

Mark lowered the piece of pajeon he had been about to put in his mouth. He looked a little startled at first, but his ornery smile eventually appeared.

"You  _ were _ jealous." Mark said. He popped the food into his mouth and amusement lit up his eyes. Still chewing, he said, "Johnny's hot but I'm not dating Johnny, am I?"

"You were still flirting with him." Jongin pointed out. He felt like a jackass, but he was legitimately jealous. "I'm just going to have to deal with you being a flirt, aren't I?"

Mark leaned in closer to Jongin. His expression was devious. "Maybe. But I'm only fucking you. I don't need anyone else, no matter how big their arms or their dick are." He kissed Jongin, slow and sloppy, no attempt at being chaste in public. Johnny was right about Mark being a little monster.

"Minhyungie, people might see." Jongin said. Mark looked unconcerned.

"There's almost no one here. What are these sadsacks going to do? Spray us with water?" Mark joked. He kissed him again, the taste of green onion still on his breath. It was true that there were barely any people around, but even at the nearly empty train station they had seen someone Mark knew. Being outted was an ever-present risk Jongin was becoming increasingly aware of. Still, with the sensual way Mark was looking at him, Jongin couldn't help but give into another kiss.

When Mark broke the kiss this time he played with Jongin's shirt. "Johnny wanted to be my boyfriend. He begged me. But I didn't date him. Don't be jealous. Do you want some songpyeon?"

"Sure." Jongin loved him so much. He didn't know how he got so lucky, for once in his life. He started towards the box of pine rice cakes they had purchased for their picnic but Mark stopped him and went to open the box himself. He used his chopsticks to pick up a piece and feed it to Jongin. Jongin happily ate it and watched Mark pick out one for himself as he chewed.

"You're a good person." Mark said. He lifted a piece of pale green songpyeon out of the box. "And your body is absolutely amazing. Don't be jealous of some guy I used to fuck around with. I'm doing my best not to be jealous of chesty women."

"You keep mentioning that. Most of my exes haven't been chesty." Jongin said. There was vulnerability on Mark's face as he chewed his songpyeon and listened to Jongin. "You don't need to be jealous of breasts."

The deviousness Mark used to hide his vulnerability resurfaced on his face. "I guess I shouldn't, considering that you get off on sucking dick." 

Jongin made a face and shoved Mark's shoulder. He picked up his chopsticks to reach for his own rice cake this time.

"Sounds to me like you like cock more than tits." Mark teased, mouth full of songpyeon.

"That's it. Johnny can have you." Jongin said. Mark laughed, ugly and sinister.

"You really want that bastard to be the one who gets to fuck my adorable ass?" Mark leaned in close again, fluttering his eyelashes and looking as cute as possible.

"He'll have to put up with your mouth too." Jongin said, ignoring him in favor of opening a bottle of soju.

"My mouth can do such incredible things to your body, though." Mark was practically in Jongin's lap now, pulling out all his charming expressions and all his most vulgar comments.

Jongin stuck a piece of songpyeon in Mark's mouth to shut him up and poured himself some pomegranate soju.

"This is the worst Chuseok ever." Jongin said with no sincerity whatsoever. Mark laughed around his songpyeon and laid his head on Jongin's shoulder.


	15. CHAPTER 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is now COMPLETE

Mark leaned back against Jongin's chest, rolling his eyes at Taeyong's gossip circle. "They're always like this." He told Jongin. "Don't take it personally."

"I mean they're not wrong about you having hooked up with a lot of weirdos from what I can tell." Jongin was looking at his own phone but snaked his arm around Mark's waist. The way Mark's heart fluttered when Jongin did things like this… it made him feel like a naive teenager again. He pinched Jongin's thigh.

"Are you calling yourself a weirdo?" Mark teased. Jongin looked at him, eyes smiling.

"I'm calling Jay and Johnny weirdos." Jongin said. "If they're standard I'd hate to see the others."

"Johnny isn't a weirdo. He's kind of a jerk but he's not a weirdo." Mark said. "But I've never slept with anyone as great as you, of course."

Jongin beamed. "I've never dated anyone as great as you."

That seemed hard to believe, given his apparent history of dating supermodels and his general Perfect Boyfriend qualities. "You don't have to lie, hyung." Mark chucked, looking down at his legs. He felt a finger slip under his chin and lift his face so he was looking at Jongin.

"I'm not lying."

Mark smiled at him. Jongin looked like he meant it. Mark still didn't believe it was true, but in that moment he believed Jongin believed it was true. He kissed him. Jongin engaged in the kiss for a while, but broke away before Mark was satisfied.

"I have to go see Taemin soon. Are you going to do your homework while I'm gone?" Jongin said. Mark sighed loudly.

"Yes, yes, of course hyung." Mark rubbed Jongin's thigh. "I'll miss you."

Jongin glowed with happiness at Mark's statement. "I'll miss you too! But it will only be a few hours. I'm happy you don't want me to go, though."

Mark snorted. "Ew. Please go. Don't come back." Jongin laughed and hugged Mark tightly from behind.

"You'll miss me!" He sing-songed as Mark shook his head in annoyance.

"You're exhausting." Mark lied. Jongin was actually refreshing to him, but saying it out seemed so obnoxious. "You went to college with Taemin, right? How long has it been since you've seen him?"

Jongin loosed up on his hug and Mark felt his chin leave his shoulder. "Hm. Since college."

"Wow, you must really miss him. Why weren't you able to keep in touch?" The question slipped out of Mark before he realized it might appear rude.

"Uh." Jongin paused and Mark began regretting his words. "I told him I loved him. He rejected me." 

Mark turned his head, trying to see Jongin's face. "You WHAT?"

"Taemin was the first guy I ever liked. Maybe the first person I loved, period." Jongin said. His profile looked sad, pained even. Mark gulped.

"And he wants to meet because…?"

"He wants to be friends again. We were really close in college. We did everything together." Jongin replied. "I stopped talking to him for a lot of reasons. The rejection, my envy that he could keep dancing and I couldn't, my feeling of inferiority towards him after getting injured… it was all just too painful." Jongin looked like he might cry. Mark had no idea what to say. 

Mark lifted his hands and placed them over Jongin's. "I love you."

Jongin really did cry, then. Mark worried he'd said the wrong thing. Jongin buried his face in the crook of Mark's neck and mumbled something.

"Hm?" Mark squeezed Jongin's hands.

Jongin lifted his head. "I love you too." He laughed. "Sorry, I'm such a mess."

"You've been through a lot." Mark reminded him. Jongin began crying even harder and buried his face in Mark's neck again. Mark could feel the tears against his skin. He had no idea how to handle this. Jongin's life had been hard, and he was such a soft-hearted person. He was a bit like Taeyong, actually. Just softer. Much softer. What would Taeyong need to hear right now? Everything Mark said seemed to make the tears worse.

Jongin lifted his head again. He sniffled. "I need to pull myself together so I can meet Taemin. You're just so sweet, Mark."

Were they good tears? Mark couldn't help the small smile that formed on his face. "You're the sweet one."

Taemin was waiting next to the coffee shop when Jongin approached. When he saw Jongin he bounced on the balls of his feet and waved animatedly. After all this time he was still so cute and childlike.

"Of course your mask has a bear mouth on it!" Taemin said when Jongin was in earshot. "You still are a teddy bear!"

Jongin giggled. "Mark likes the bear stuff. He bought this for me yesterday."

"How is Mark doing? He graduates this winter, right?" Jongin nodded. Taemin opened the door for Jongin to enter the coffee shop. It made Jongin feel warm inside. It was sweet little actions like this that had made him fall for Taemin. Quietly and effortlessly caring for those that mattered to him. Ten and Taeyong were lucky to have him.

"I'll buy." Taemin said casually as they approached the counter. "What are you in the mood for?"

"Green tea for me. Would you believe my boyfriend doesn't drink green tea?" Jongin said. Taemin laughed.

"That doesn't surprise me. He eats like a small child. Sweets and soda." Taemin ordered them both green tea and some honey bread for them to share.

"How is your family doing?" Taemin asked as they sat down at a table by the window.

"Uh. Jungah has a café now. And Jungsoo has two kids. They're really cute." Jongin smiled a bit at the thought of his niece and nephew. "They're growing up really nicely."

"That's great to hear!" Taemin replied. "I guess you just saw them for Chuseok, huh?"

Jongin looked down at his hands on the table. "Well, actually, I couldn't see them for Chuseok. I'm actually staying with Mark at his dorm right now. They don't approve of our relationship." 

"Jongin, that's terrible!" Taemin sounded legitimately angry. "How can they not accept it? They won't even let you come home?"

Jongin flinched. "I can go home. I just can't bring Mark. They expect me to marry a woman."

"Why is it important for them that you marry a woman?" Taemin asked. Jongin paused because he noticed the barista approaching with their tray out of the corner of his eye. He thanked her as she sat down their order and waited until she was out of earshot before he spoke again.

"It looks bad. For me to be with a guy. And they think I've made them look bad enough." Jongin explained quietly.

"Excuse me?" Taemin hissed. It made Jongin feel good that his old friend felt so protective of him after all this time. "What have you done to make them look bad? You have poured your heart and soul into everything you've ever done."

Jongin picked up his tea cup and sipped it. It was still too hot and burned his tongue. It was still so hard to explain this to Taemin.

"I never finished my military service. My injury got so bad that I had to go home. I lied to you about it at the time. My mom was so embarrassed and so was I. She saw me as a huge disappointment. It was even worse when I couldn't dance anymore. She said she worried I'd just become a useless burden on the family." Jongin looked nervously up at Taemin's angelic face. Taemin was gazing at him with a soft, sympathetic expression.

"Leaving the military early is nothing to be embarrassed about. It's not all that uncommon. I have a cousin that couldn't go at all because of his health." Taemin explained. "I would have never judged you for that."

"I felt like I lost everything back then." Jongin looked down again, into his still-steaming mug.

"I felt like I lost a lot too, when you stopped talking to me. You were my best friend." Taemin said. "I had no idea how bad things were for you at home."

"They weren't all bad. As long as I played by the rules." Jongin said. The whipped cream was melting into the warm honey bread. Jongin didn't know if he had the stomach to eat it.

"But they can't expect you to always live by their rules. And they can't hold things against you that aren't your fault." Taemin told him. He could feel Taemin's eyes boring into him. He still didn't look up.

"I'm sorry I lied."

"I'm sorry your family made you feel like you have something to be ashamed of."

Jongin finally looked up. Taemin looked so serious. "I think maybe…. my sisters don't know everything either. It's not their fault. I should talk to them."

"I always liked them. If things work out, maybe I can meet Jungsoo's kids." Taemin's expression lightened a bit. He lifted his mug and took a sip of tea.

Jongin smiled. "They're really cute. I hope I can see them again."

He glanced out the window. A mother was walking past with a happy child holding her hand. He did miss his niece and nephew.

"Do you want to hear about physical therapy now?" Taemin asked, graciously changing the subject. Jongin looked at him again with a grin.

"Yes, tell me what you learned!"


	16. CHAPTER 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is COMPLETE.
> 
> (Sorry I've been so bad about adding the updates on here TT I'm getting ready to move.)

When Mark arrived at his cubicle, Donghyuk was staring blankly at his empty black computer screen.

"Everything okay there?" Mark asked, putting his hand on Donghyuk's shoulder.

To Mark's surprise Donghyuk shrugged off his hand and didn't look at him. "I'm just having a bad day."

"How so?" Mark tried. It was weird to see Donghyuk like this. The man usually had boundless energy.

"My girlfriend dumped me this morning." Donghyuk huffed. "I know you can't relate because you're all happy and in love."

Mark knelt down next to Donghyuk's chair. "I know what it's like for relationships to end. Like, in general. I've lost a lot of friends."

"That's different… but it doesn't matter. Let's get to work." Donghyuk shook his mouse and woke up his computer. He wasn't even logged in. Mark didn't stand.

"I'm sorry that happened. Do you want to hang out today?" Mark offered. Donghyuk was a lot, but he seemed so down. Donghyuk glanced sidelong at him.

"What do you want to do?" He asked.

"What sounds fun to you? You still want to do a multibang?" Mark gave him a smile.

"Let's go to noraebang. I need to sing sad ballads." Donghyuk replied. Mark could tell he was playing up his pouting now to get his way.

"Okay. Noraebang. Do you want it to be just us or can I invite Jongin?" Mark asked him.

"No, I can't watch you two be all lovey-dovey right now." Donghyuk whined. "Let's just go you and me."

"Okay." Mark finally stood up and patted Donghyuk's shoulder again. "Sorry you had a shitty morning."

"She told me she realized since she's about to graduate she wants to focus on a relationship she can see becoming permanent. And she didn't see that with me." Donghyuk said as Mark turned back towards his desk. "I thought we could have been permanent."

Mark didn't know what to say to that. He knew that must have hurt. He also knew it hurt to be on the side of the person doing the rejection. These kinds of situations hurt everyone involved.

"I'm sorry, Donghyuk." He said uselessly. There was silence. He returned to his desk. He wished he had better words to offer him. After Mark was sitting down and had logged into his computer he heard Donghyuk speak again.

"I told my parents over Chuseok that I might have already found the woman I wanted to marry." He said. Ouch. Mark felt terrible how out of his element he was in this conversation. He wanted to make Donghyuk feel better but he had no idea how.

"You're still really young though. You will meet plenty of other women." It was so cliche that Mark felt like a jerk as he spoke. But he felt like he needed to say something.

"One of my other friends said this was a chance to have other kinds of experiences." Donghyuk said.

"That's a good way to look at it, actually." Mark replied. "Just have fun for a while."

"I wish you were single." Donghyuk mused. "I'd like to try it with a guy."

"Excuse me?" Mark hissed. He turned around and looked at Donghyuk in horror. He had to be joking. He was looking at Mark, completely serious. His expression even looked wistful.

"You seem like you'd do a good job. Plus I like and trust you a lot." Donghyuk said to him, face unchanging and showing not a hint of mirth.

"I… I guess I'm honored?" Mark was stupefied. "If you want that I'm sure you can find someone though. Run them by me first and I'll tell you if they're shit."

"I bet you're an amazing boyfriend." Donghyuk said. Everything about this was so uncomfortable. Donghyuk was a mess right now and Mark wasn't sure how much of what he was saying was just out of the sadness of being dumped.

"I'm sure you are too. You'll find someone." Mark offered. He opened his backpack and began digging around in it for his earbuds. He could not handle this weird conversation right now.

"Fuck, you said you had a really high tolerance." Mark struggled to help Donghyuk exit the norebang, waving to the man at the desk in thanks for their extra time in the room as they passed. Donghyuk had consumed almost 4 whole bottles of soju on his own, insisting he usually could drink 5. Mark should have known better. He was drunk himself, but he had to get Donghyuk.

"Where are we going now?" Donghyuk slurred.

"Home. Where do you live?" Mark asked. Someone should probably keep an eye on him. "Do you have a roommate?"

"Nope! He dropped out so I am all alone!" Donghyuk explained getting spit on Mark's face with his drunken enthusiasm.

"You shouldn't be alone like this but I can't take in anymore strays. My dorm is already crowded." Mark sighed. This was a frustrating situation.

"You can stay with me. There's an extra bed." Donghyuk offered. He was so close to Mark's face the smell of soju was suffocating.

"I have to tell my boyfriend." Mark grumbled. It was the best idea for him to watch Donghyuk at his own dorm. But he felt bad leaving Jongin alone with Jeno.

"I think that water made my stomach hurt worse." Donghyuk said. Mark was putting sheets on the top bunk. He glanced down at Donghyuk who was staring into an empty cup.

"Jongin was right. He said to get you gatorade or juice." Mark said, folding the sheet under the mattress. "I'll run to CU and grab you something. What do you want?"

"Orange juice!" Donghyuk replied, instantly more upbeat. "Thank you Mark hyung~!" He added cutely. He took his obnoxious cutesiness up to 11 when he was plastered.

"Probably too acidic." Mark said. He began down the ladder, hoping he wouldn't fall as a result of his own inebriation.

"You asked me what I wanted hyung~!" Donghyuk pouted. Mark made sure to make his eye roll very obvious.

"Fine, I'll get you orange juice. Stay here and call me if there's an emergency." Mark grabbed his jacket off Donghyuk's desk, but Donghyuk grabbed his arm before he could put it on. 

"I have orange juice in the fridge! Do you want some?" Donghyuk asked him. His face was so earnest and Mark was so irritated.

"Why didn't you tell me that earlier?" He grumbled.

"I wanted water. I was dehydrated." A playful smirk teased at Donghyuk's lips. "Hyung, are you annoyed with me?"

"Pretty much constantly." Mark replied. "Show me where the fucking kitchen is you jackass." 

Donghyuk stayed in his seat and pointed at the door. "Down the hallway."

"I should have just let you die." Mark spat at him before storming through the door toward the general direction of the supposed dorm kitchen.

When he came back, Donghyuk had his head on his desk, arms blocking out the world. Hearing the door open he looked up, face brightening at the sight of Mark.

"Dude, are you okay?" Mark asked, feeling a little guilty. Donghyuk acted like a brat, but he was still a man who just got dumped by someone he apparently would have happily spent the rest of his life with. 

"I am because hyung is staying with me~!" Donghyuk replied. He sat up straighter, holding his hands out for his orange juice.

"Stop acting cute." Mark ordered. Donghyuk snickered.

"Why? Hyung likes it~!" Donghyuk was really laying it on thick. It was unbearable.

"Why would you think I would like  _ this _ ?" Mark gestured to Donghyuk, who was sipping his orange juice with one hand and using the other to prop up his smiling face.

"Straight guys like it when girls act cute. I bet you like it when guys act cute." Donghyuk reasoned. Mark narrowed his eyes.

"Dude, are you flirting?" Mark asked. Donghyuk snickered again. "I have a boyfriend."

Donghyuk pouted. "I know. I'm sad."

"You're also straight." Mark reminded him.

"Yeah. But doesn't everyone like both a little bit?" Donghyuk asked. He took another drink of orange juice but kept his eyes on Mark. Mark snorted.

"What the fuck? No. I don't." He said. Donghyuk looked down into his drink, pointlessly swirling it around in his cup a bit.

"Do you think I could be like Jongin?" Donghyuk asked into his drink, as if he expected an answer to appear spelled out in orange juice pulp.

"You mean bisexual?" This was a weird conversation. Mark was too drunk and tired for this. "I don't fucking know Donghyuk. Only you know that. It's too late for this. Let's just go to bed."

Donghyuk nodded, not looking up or making an attempt to move. Mark sighed loudly.

"What? Do you need to talk about it?" He asked.

Donghyuk finally looked up. "It's okay. You're right. Thank you for staying with me so I don't have to be alone."

Mark gave him a small smile in return. "It's fine if you're bisexual, obviously. We can talk about it when we're sober, maybe." 


	17. CHAPTER 17 (ONGOING)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is ONGOING. Updates to come!

Sehun was fucking Donghyuk into a futon blanket he's laid out so they didn't have to go up into the cramped loft. His dogs were safely in their kennels, and now he could just focus on the twink that was shamelessly covering his neck in hickies.

Normally, Sehun would be against getting marks on his neck, but he was addicted to the way Donghyuk was acting like an overeager student wanting to feel and experience everything. Sehun was unable to deny him any desire.

He jerked Donghyuk off while he fucked him, and he could tell he was nearly ready to cum. He smirked as he felt Donghyuk spill into his hand. He should have known. Donghyuk wasn't very experienced, so it made sense he wouldn't last long.

Sehun pulled out and began jerking himself off, giving Donghyuk a chance to get his bearings.

"Wait… hold on…" Donghyuk said, getting shakely up onto his knees.

"Hm? You okay?" Sehun asked, trying hard to focus on what Donghyuk needed and not just his own erection.

"I can… Mark showed me how to do a blow job…" Donghyuk crawled towards him.

Sehun heard himself let out a little gasp. That mental image would definitely get him closer to finishing.

"Oh really? His boyfriend was okay with that?"

Donghyuk snorted. "He sent me articles. I _wish_ he had actually done that."

"Jongin locked him down as fast as he could." Sehun chuckled. "You don't have to do that. Just looking at you is good."

"I want to try it." Donghyuk said. He was huffy, indignant. Sehun was into it.

"Okay. Do your thing, cutie."

It was an honorable first attempt. Sehun helped give him pointers as he went. He looked adorably determined and focused. The flutter in his chest reminded him that Jongin had tried to warn him where this might lead.

"How do you feel?" Sehun asked after they had both finished. "Does anything hurt?"

"It feels kind of weird." Donghyuk snuggled up next to him. Fuck, he was endearing.

"What does?" Sehun asked, wrapping his arm around him.

"My butt."

Sehun laughed. "Yeah. That'll happen. You'll get used to it."

"Can I be a top next time?" Donghyuk asked. Sehun laughed harder than he should have. The way he asked made it sound like he thought the answer would be "no."

"Yeah, that sounds great." Sehun grinned. "When will next time be?"

"When do you want it to be?" Everything was always a question from him.

"Tell me what you want, Donghyuk." Sehun said sensually, hoping to coax what Donghyuk really wanted out of him.

Donghyuk was silent. He seemed to be thinking it over. "Soon. Really soon."

"Why don't you spend the night, and you can top me before work tomorrow, cutie?" Sehun asked. He lowered his head, trying to make eye contact with the man snuggled into his side.

"Okay." Donghyuk said, expression unchanging.

"Just okay? Do you want something else?" Sehun proded.

"No. I want that." Donghyuk told him. He looked back into Sehun's eyes. The determination was there again. Like he didn't want to back down from a challenge. He was an interesting guy.

"Cool. You can always change your mind." Sehun assured him. In response he was met with a kiss. Interesting guy, indeed.

Chanyeol was sitting at the kitchen table with Jungah and Jongin's mother when Sehun came in. Next to Sehun was a tan skinned young man about ten centimeters shorter and much less athletic. His lightened hair and baggy clothes looked familiar. Chanyeol wondered if he was the man Sehun had posted about on twitter.

"What are you doing here?" Sehun asked Chanyeol icily rather than greeting the three people at the table.

"I'm here to help." Chanyeol said. He was tired of this needless hostility. "I'll be able to lift more than this guy." He gestured to the man next to Sehun, who scowled back indignantly.

"What's the problem with Big Ears here?" The light-haired man made a point of asking the question to Sehun, turning away from Chanyeol. Sehun snorted. He looked delighted. Stupid gay man, easily amused by any snobby boy willing to give him the time of day.

"Donghyuk is stronger than he looks." Sehun told Chanyeol, placing his hand on Donghyuk's shoulder. "You can help us load the trailer on this end, but there's no way you can come to Jongin's with us."

"Why not?" Chanyeol whined. He was sick of being shut out. "It will be easier to have more hands right?"

"They already have plenty of hands on the other end." Sehun replied. He was obnoxiously calm. "Also, if Jongin didn't want to see you then I'm not going to be the one to force him."

Chanyeol stood up, bumping his knees on the table as he rose. "I'm trying to help him! It shouldn't be for you to decide if I get to see him or not!"

"It isn't for me to decide." Sehun snapped back without hesitation. His eyes narrowed a bit. "But if Jongin didn't invite you and continues not to speak to you, I think showing you where he lives would be disrespectful to him, don't you think?"

Jungah, who was sitting closer to where Sehun and Donghyuk stood, glanced up at Chanyeol. "Chanyeol," Jungah addressed him gently. "He makes a good point. Today might not be the day to -"

"It will be good for Jongin to speak to a sensible friend." Jongin's mother cut in. "I would feel more comfortable if Chanyeol went."

"Mother, I don't think this is a good time to upset Jongin further." Jungah said. She put her hand on her mother's. "Let's just get through this move, then work out the rest later." Her mother turned away, deliberately looking the opposite direction of her daughter. An uncomfortable silence settled on the room.

"Where is Jongin's stuff?" Donghyuk asked. Chanyeol looked at him in disbelief. What a completely tactless question. Donghyuk looked impatient but, perhaps, at least a little guilty about cutting in. Chanyeol glanced at Sehun, who looked a disgusting combination of smug and amused by Donghyuk's statement.

"I'll show you." Jungah said after a brief pause, presumably to recover from the lack of manners Donghyuk has displayed. She rose slowly, giving her mother another awkward glance before heading towards Jongin's room. They really didn't need to be shown, Sehun knew where it was and knew what needed to be taken.

Chanyeol followed them into the room, not surprised that Sehun immediately began giving out instructions. Sehun and Jungah left to retrieve boxes from the truck for Jongin's belongings, leaving Donghyuk to move the contents of Jongin's dresser into a suitcase they had brought in with them. He gave no instructions to Chanyeol, only a brief glance and a curt whisper not to "push it" today.

Chanyeol watched Donghyuk work diligently, annoyed that he had apparently been replaced by a complete stranger. Why was someone Chanyeol had never even met removing Jongin's clothes from his childhood dresser?

"Who are you?" Chanyeol spat when he couldn't take it any longer. His statement startled Donghyuk enough to earn him a glance.

"Donghyuk. Who are you?" Donghyuk replied as he continued placing Jongin's clothes in the suitcase.

"I'm Jongin's best friend." Chanyeol informed him.

Donghyuk didn't look at him this time. "Pretty sure his best friend is Sehun."

"Did Sehun tell you that?" Chanyeol grumbled.

"Didn't have to. Everyone knows that." Seriously, who the fuck was this asshole?

"Who is everyone?" The question came out louder than he expected.

Donghyuk looked at him again, regarding him as you might a drunk person rambling loudly on the train.

"You don't seem to know much for someone who claims to be Jongin's best friend."

"I've known Jongin since he was a teenager and I've never even seen you before." Chanyeol shouted. His hands were balled into fists. He wanted to scream at this man until he stopped talking shit.

"Do you need any help?" Jongin's mother's strained voice asked behind him.

"No." Chanyeol clamped his mouth shut. Jungah had insisted they all try to get through today as civilly as possible so that any future reconciliation would go more smoothly. She was right, but this Donghyuk jackass was making things hard for Chanyeol.

When Jungah and Sehun returned with boxes, Sehun handed one to Chanyeol.

"Can you put what's on his desk in here?" Sehun asked.

"Who the fuck is this Donghyuk guy?" Chanyeol whispered to Sehun.

"He works with Jongin and Mark. I hope you haven't been bothering him." Sehun replied, kneeling down to unplug a power strip from the wall.

"Why did you bring him?" Chanyeol hissed. "Does he even know about Jongin and Mark?"

"He does. He wanted to help and he was already at my place this morning anyway." Sehun said. He looked smug again. He was methodically unplugging the wires from the power strip and neatly wrapping them up before placing them in the box, his expression one of a man who had been winning too much lately.

"You're fucking him." Chanyeol said. "That's why you brought him. You picked some random whore over me." Sehun's expression instantly changed.

"Are you talking about me?" Donghyuk asked. Chanyeol stared into Sehun's chilly glare.

"I brought him because he's Mark's friend and he wanted to help." Sehun told him.

"I can't believe this slut is getting treated like he's more a part of Jongin's life than me. Just because you're into his dick." Chanyeol felt a mix of gratification and horror as the words were coming out of his mouth. It felt good to get back at Sehun, to maybe make him feel some of the anger and frustration Chanyeol had been feeling lately. But he also knew it was wrong to say these things to Sehun, and to say them in front of Jungah and a person he barely knew.

"Chanyeol." There was a warning in Jungah's voice.

"Am I wrong?" Chanyeol steamrolled on. He might be doing irreparable damage to his and Sehun's relationship. But the rush he got from getting out his feelings was addictive. "This guy is nobody. He means nothing to Jongin and has nothing to do with this. You've replaced me with someone who's willing to suck you off the second you snap your fingers."

Jungah cleared her through. "Chanyeol, I think you should leave."

"Me? I should leave?" Chanyeol roared, turning on her. "Why me? I'm practically family to you, Jungah. And who is he?" Chanyeol gestured to Donghyuk.

"Not the one in this room that needs anger management classes, that's for sure." Donghyuk retorted. Chanyeol looked at him. He was still emptying out Jongin's dresser, completely unfazed by Chanyeol's barrage of insults. Chanyeol felt sick to his stomach.

Jungah took Chanyeol's arm and began leading him to the door. After they were out of Jongin's bedroom she began to whisper to him. "I know this is hard for you. But don't take it out on Sehun and his friend."

Chanyeol scrunched up his face to hold back angry tears. "Why? Why do I have to get ditched like this?"

"Jongin has always cared a lot about you." Jungah assured him. "Things are just messy right now. Losing your temper is just going to make it worse."

Chanyeol pursed his lips and gave one more look at Jongin's door.

"Talk to Jongin for me." He said to Jungah. She nodded.

"When the dust has cleared." She said.

Instead of returning to his apartment, Chanyeol went to his parents' apartment to blow off steam by eating home cooked food and mindlessly watching TV. While he was watching a reality show that he was far too moody to enjoy the humor of, he felt a little tap on his leg. He looked down to see Toben's black eyes staring up at him, his tiny paw on Chanyeol's calf. For once he wasn't scrambling around recklessly, barking and wreaking havoc. He tapped Chanyeol again, thrusting his head toward him insistently. 

"What do you want, jackass?" Chanyeol whined. Toben bounced on his back paws, his front paws stretched up toward Chanyeol. "Do you want to be picked up?" Toben responded with one quick, happy bark. Chanyeol groaned and reached down to grab the bouncy poodle. 

Chanyeol expected the little monster to lose his shit when he got up on the couch, but instead he curled up in Chanyeol's lap, laying his chin on Chanyeol's hand. 

"Are you… trying to cheer me up?" Chanyeol was suspicious. He'd never seen Toben so calm. Toben licked Chanyeol's thumb.

Chanyeol scratched the dog's ears. "What are you up to, fucker?" He asked. He realized he was smiling. Had the bane of his existence just become his new best friend?

Chanyeol pulled Toben into a hug, and the dog licked his face appreciatively. "Nothing makes sense." Chanyeol laughed.

  


While the others ate and celebrated Jongin's move, Sehun stepped out in the hallway. He was debating whether or not he should call Chanyeol and try to talk sense into him again. He heard Jongin's apartment door open, and looked up from his phone to see Donghyuk coming out. Donghyuk walked over to where Sehun was leaning against the wall and stuffed his hands in his pocket.

"He said we'd have pork belly, but he got fried chicken." He complained. Sehun smirked and lowered his phone.

"Too many people to grill for, too many people to take out to a restaurant right now." Sehun reasoned. Donghyuk nodded, face puffed up in a cute pout. He leaned against the wall next to Sehun.

"I'm gonna be sore tomorrow." Donghyuk commented, seemingly for lack of a better topic.

"From this morning or from helping Jongin move?" Sehun teased. Donghyuk laughed and looked down, running his hand through his hair. They stood in silence. It was comfortable. Sehun put his phone in his back pocket and crossed his arms.

"It's amusing to watch Youngho and Jongin." Sehun noted, nodding toward Jongin's door.

"Why don't they like each other?" Donghyuk asked. 

"They both love Mark." Sehun explained.

"Oh." Donghyuk replied. "Mark's lucky."

Sehun snorted. "Why? I wouldn't want to be in the position."

Donghyuk looked down. "No one's in love with me."

"If that's true, which it might not be, then I guarantee that will change." Sehun assured him. He reached out and ruffled Donghyuk's hair.

Donghyuk smiled weakly at him. "Getting dumped sucks."

"I've been told." Sehun laughed. He crossed his arms again and pressed his lips together. He wasn't sure how to cheer him up.

"You've never been dumped?" Donghyuk asked earnestly.

Sehun narrowed his eyes at the door in front of them. "No, but I think I just got my heartbroken."

"You think? By who?" Donghyuk had the hint of a whine that always came into his voice when he was confused. Sehun found it endearing.

"A long time friend." Sehun said. "Someone I thought I'd never lose."

"Oh. Who?" Donghyuk was looking at the door too now, like he was trying to think of who in the apartment might have hurt Sehun.

"No one inside there. Don't worry." Sehun said. "It's not important right now, I guess."

"Why not?"

Sehun smiled and turned towards him, leaning his head on the wall. "Because I know I have people who have my back. When life is hard you have to take inventory of what you do have going for you."

Donghyuk was still staring at the door, focused and thoughtful. "It was that guy earlier. At Jongin's place. Wasn't it?"

"Yeah. I'm sorry he was such a jackass to you. It pissed me off." Sehun said. Donghyuk met his gaze, expression hard.

"You deserve better than a friend like that." Donghyuk told him. "He's a bad man."

Sehun snorted. "Yeah. You're cute. Will you come home with me tonight?"

Donghyuk's face brightened, a flash of excitement in his eyes. "Yes! Can I sleep over?"

"Of course. You must be tired from all the work we did today." Sehun bit his lip and let his eyes wander down Donghyuk's body.

"Not too tired for sex!" Donghyuk exclaimed. Sehun chuckled.

"You don't have any subtlety at all, do you?" Sehun asked.


End file.
